As unlikely as Newtie’s Moon colony suggestion was, I couldn’t help but nod my head and growl, “Yeah! What happened to the America that can?”
Full Story »Letters from a Concerned Zombie: Dear America
Congratulations on not going all Barbara on this odd-numbered election year. Remember, a healthy nation is a tasty nation.
Full Story »Letters from a Concerned Zombie: Dear Oakland PD
I thought we zombies would be the ones to make the United States look like a third world country on the news. You beat us to the punch, Oakland PD. Well done.
Full Story »Letters from a Concerned Zombie: Dear Tea Party Zombies
It is my pleasure to inform you that this Concerned Zombie does not support the game, Tea Party Zombies Must Die, and plans to boycott it.
Full Story »Letters From A Concerned Zombie: Dear Michele Bachmann
Here’s the thing, Michele. No one is going to blame me for ripping out my neighbor’s liver and making fois gras with it. My neighbor is a racist anti-Semite who puts her garbage out on the wrong day, anyway. But you, Michele. People might think you’re racist because of this pledge. And that’s way worse.
Full Story »Letters from A Concerned Zombie: Dear Andrew Breitbart
You’re being awarded with the elite status of Honorary Zombie.
You’re already a figurative zombie, a soulless shambling shell of a man, feeding an insatiable hunger for attention and washing it down with a mimosa mixed from Democratic tears. I literally am a festering sack of rotting humanity and you make me throw up a little in my mouth.
Full Story »Letters From A Concerned Zombie: Dear Congressman Rohrabacher
Certainly, Mr. Rohrabacher, you could have had an intern Google this for you. I’m a zombie, and even I have an intern. He’s an MBA from Colgate. I’m quite looking forward to eating him later, unless he can find some tossed out Boar’s Head cold cuts in our immediate vicinity.
Full Story »We the Geeks of the United States
by Nancy Mathews
Dear Joe Six Pack,
I wanted to write to you to assure you that all is well. There is no need to fear the Presidency of Barack Obama. The geeks and nerds of the world are extremely trustworthy.
Full Story »Geek Survey: Endorsement By Association
By Lisa Fary
Colin Powell’s hip-hop dancing was really a covert endorsement for B-Rock.
Full Story »Liveblogapalooza: Final Presidential Debate
If you must watch the debate alone in the dark with a bottle of bargain booze, at least bathe yourself in the glow of the internets and the liveblogapalooza therein.
Full Story »
