Goodbye Jaime Summers

By Melissa Voelker Bionic Woman may not have been a terribly well written or well acted show, yet I still feel it deserves a proper send off into the land of Television Programs That Are No More. Sure I wanted to scream and yell and shake some sense into Jaime Summers from time to time, [...]

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Bionic Woman: Do Not Disturb

By Melissa Voelker Tonight’s very special episode begins with a bar wake for poor Antonio, with everyone sitting around a table drinking and looking forlorn. That’s right, I almost forgot he bit it at the end of the last episode. It was done so quickly and in such an overused, cliché type of way that [...]

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Bionic Woman: Trust Issues

By Melissa Voelker Tonight I’ve been drinking some Sake Dew (Sake mixed with Mt Dew – it’s tasty, believe me) so maybe that will make things better as I watch the new Bionic Woman episode. Or maybe not. Related Stuff:

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Bionic Showdown: The Ultimate Battle of the Bionic Women Round 5 – Characters

By Melissa Voelker Though the last round ended in a surprising tie, the 1976 Bionic Woman is leading the competition 3-2 and needs only to win this last round in order to take the crown as the Ultimate Bionic victor. To give the 2007 show a bit more of a chance they will start off [...]

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Bionic Woman: The List

By Melissa Voelker Ah to be a young bionic woman in love – or lust. Whatever. Especially when it is with someone you aren’t supposed to be with because he is from the wrong side of the super secret government agency tracks. How will Jaime’s new relationship with CIA hottie Tom ever work out? Do [...]

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Bionic Showdown: The Ultimate Battle of the Bionic Women Round 4 – Super Powers

By Melissa Voelker Once again the 1976 original Bionic Woman took the lead in the showdown, but it was a slim victory over the last round so if it wants to stay on top it is going to have to really bring its best for this fight – Bionic Powers. Because it is now in [...]

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Bionic Showdown: The Ultimate Battle of the Bionic Women Round 3 – Bionic Plot

By Melissa Voelker It was a surprise upset in the last round when the 2007 Bionic Woman series trampled the 1976 original under its casting might. Though Lindsey Wagner and her crew threw out resumes and starring roles to the best of their ability, it just wasn’t enough to beat the impressive list of genre [...]

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Bionic Woman: The Education of Jaime Sommers

By Melissa Voelker My experiment last week (when I tried to watch as if I had never seen the show before and had no previous notions about it) was ultimately an utter failure. While the episode started out pretty good it fell flat on its face by the second half, and I think I was [...]

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Bionic Showdown: The Ultimate Battle of the Bionic Women Round 2 – Bionic Cast

Fresh from their first round victory, the original 1976 Bionic Woman series is primed to duke it out in Round Two of the Bionic Showdown. They have assembled their list of actors, shined their killer celebrity smiles, and polished their genre resumes of past Sci-Fi/Fantasy/Action Hero experiences. Because they took the lead after the starting [...]

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Bionic Woman: Face Off

By Melissa Voelker I’ve decided to watch the show this week as if I’ve never seen it before. The slate is wiped clean and I’m ready to pretend I have no previous opinions or thoughts about The Bionic Woman. I’m going to take deep, calming, cleansing breaths, put a smile on my face, and settle [...]

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Bionic Showdown: The Ultimate Battle of the Bionic Women Round 1 – Bionic Pedigree

By Melissa Voelker Actress Lindsey Wagner or starlet Michelle Ryan? Love interest Six Million Dollar Man Steve Austen or Boyfriend Professor of Bionics Will Anthros? Furry bionic dog sidekick Max or computer hacker younger sister sidekick Becca? Which version of the Bionic Woman is supreme, and what gives it the right to carry that title? [...]

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Bionic Woman: Sisterhood

By Melissa Agent Kung-Fu and Jamie partake in a little sparring, and he kicks her ass while berating her for being too predictable in her movements (and bionic super powers went where, exactly?) Next comes sister bonding time which for once isn’t so awful. Shan-Yu breaks things up by calling Jamie with a mission to [...]

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Bionic Woman: Paradise Lost

It looks like Professor Boyfriend didn’t make it after getting shot by Crazy Katee, as this episode opens on his funeral. Jamie and Lil Sis are there, both trying valiantly to actually cry. Jamie has a run in with Shan-Yu and makes it clear that now she won’t play any of his reindeer games. Then [...]

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The Bionic Woman – Pilot, Version 2

By Melissa Voelker I think that we the viewers have been misled. We were thinking that this revamped series was about a new and improved Jamie Summers, the heroine from the less than award winning but much loved original. But after sitting through the pilot of The Bionic Woman for a second time I realized [...]

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The Bionic Woman: Pilot Review

Review by Melissa Voelker For those tuning in to the new Bionic Woman series looking for some relief from Katee Sackoff withdrawal until the new season of Battlestar Galactica starts up, you will be happy to learn her first appearance happens within about a minute and a half. The show opens on a group of [...]

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Ryan Gets Bionic

NBC is getting into the re-imagination business with the new Bionic Woman. Michelle Ryan, of BBC’s EastEnders, has been cast in the lead role of Jamie Summers. NBC is calling The Bionic Woman a “drama pilot”. I don’t know about that “drama” tag. A tennis pro with $50 million worth of bionic implants sounds pretty [...]

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