The Vampire Diaries: Do Not Go Gentle

OH NO! They killed Alaric! But we’ll get to that later.

The kids at Mystic Falls are having a high school dance. Look! They do go to school, but only when the plot calls for it. The same goes for Bonnie. She gets some screen time, but only because this episode is in need of her witchy powers. Let’s not talk about how her mom was turned into a vampire and then left her again because that’s not important.

Poor Bonnie, she never gets to have nice things without someone coming along and trying to choke it to death or eat her. She needs new friends.

Ester, the mother of all originals, is still trying to murder her offspring with the help of Evil!Alaric. She has the remaining original vampire-killing stake and uses Alaric’s magical ring of non-death to ensure that last stake is now an awesome weapon of death. But, she also needs to ensure that Evil!Alaric will be an awesome vampire hunter of death by making him into an original vampire….hunter? Sure, let’s go with it.

Then there’s Rebekah. That poor child gets to be her mother’s vessel and then gets shanked for her trouble. She’s spent 95% of her life daggered and in a coffin. First because of her brother,  then Elena, then her own mother. She and Bonnie should be BFFs since their lives consist of the same amount of suckage and they only get to be on the show when there isn’t another way to contrive the plot for ultimate shock

There’s some relationship angst, which I don’t care about because seriously, these are old ass vampires, hybrids, and not-quite-adults trying to fight over one another or something just as stupid. Bleah.

There are about 15 minutes of this episode that I did enjoy that every second of them consisted of Alaric. I usually find him boring and useless. Not the actor, he’s just fine. But the character…they never really give him more to do than die and then come back.

This time, he dies, but only after Ester starts the transformation to make him into another original. It’s actually very sad. Before she stakes him, he’s Evil!Alaric. After he because Vampire!Alaric he’s initially very much his old self. He kills Ester (OH NO! They killed Ester!) to keep her from having Matt and Jeremy kill each other.

Then the poor guy decides not to finish his vampire transformation. If you’ll recall this show’s lore, he’ll need some human blood to become a vampire Without it, he’ll die, once and for all.

He’s more than willing to sacrifice himself to save everyone else because he’s noble and I feel sorry for him. I really do.

It even gets me a little misty when he walks out to find the entire gang standing outside waiting to say goodbye. Awww. I didn’t cry. You can’t prove I did. Plus the pollen in Virginia is really bad this time of year. Just saying.

Damon, being the awesome guy he is (insert sarcasm here), spends time with his friend. They drink alcohol, as these two often do when they hang out and make fun of each other. Alaric takes his last breath and his head gentle rolls to the side. He’s dead and Damon gets weepy eyed himself.

I believe in Alaric’s death as much as you do since we haven’t gotten to this weeks cliffhanger.

Bonnie (I told you she was important this week) gets ghostly witchy whispers and dreams of dead Ester. Bonnie’s dead witch sisters want her to finish what Ester started. Bonnie ends up at the crypt where Alaric has peacefully passed on only to cut her hand and shove her blood down his throat.

He grasps hold of her, bites her neck and drops her like a used candy wrapper.

Looks like the game of “Let’s kill all vampires by killing all the originals” is on.

I would like to know why they didn’t just destroy the remaining dagger after all these. Have these people not watched their own show to know that their best laid plans suck ass and always end up in the toilet? Someone should keep a diary or something so they can go back and learn from their mistakes.

This show is called the Vampire Diaries, is it not? One of these people should have a reliable record. Oh wait, they probably use it to talk about their feelings and who kissed them that week. That’s important in a town with a body count higher than the eastern hemisphere.

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