Or, The One Where There’s Two Kirks and One of ‘Em is a Rapist
The more I watch, the more I realize that Spock is my one true love.
Sure, I recognize the conventional attractiveness of Captain Kirk and certainly like to look at his butt. But, he’s withering in comparison to Spock’s intellect, reason, and ability to keep his $h!t together.
So, Spock. Let’s get together and shove down all our feelings at each other. It would be really special.
While the last ep was about what’s beneath our niceties, “The Enemy Within” is straight up about the duality of man, literally splitting Kirk into his good an evil halves. It’s a sentiment I don’t think enough people grasp or appreciate, preferring the simplicity of absolutes. But, none of us are all good or all bad; we all have a needed monster inside us.
“The Enemy Within” may be the first recorded instance of William Shatner milking every second of screen time with his (patent-pending) overacting technique. The rubber face, the Manson lamps, the anguished screaming. It was truly a sight to behold.
I pretty much make all of those faces in every work meeting on any given day.
Additionally, John and I speculated that this episode is the point of origin for all Star Trek slash.
Some “Enemy Within” Moments:
One day, I’m going to own a dog. And that dog will rue the day I ever watched this episode because my dog will be wearing a horned fur suit like this one. I love that the alien species is just someone’s little Labrador in a costume.
I don’t know how Captain Kirk gets any kind of sexytime done in this room. I’d feel like that stone head was judging me.
Here we go. Evil Kirk, walking down the hallway, drinking stolen booze (like a boss).
There’s some nice, gentle, shirtless Kirk. We’re going to need to hold on to this image to temper what’s about to happen.
During the attempted rape scene, we had this conversation…
John: So, there’s a rapist inside Captain Kirk?
Me: I guess so.
John: That’s not normal, you know. Most of us don’t have a rapist inside us.
The Yeoman Rand Sexual Harassment Count is officially ON. She’s harassed in the hallways anytime she goes anywhere. She got sexually assaulted by Charlie X. Now, she gets sexually assaulted by Bad Kirk. Janice should be issued a rape whistle and pepper spray. Ya know…screw that. Janice needs a phaser in that little black messenger bag she carries. It would save her the trouble of using art as armor.
Real subtle, there, Bad Kirk. That’s the way to be sneaky.
In the end, Bad Kirk is overcome by the sheer emotionality of existence and Gentle Kirk is there to pick up the pieces. Bad Kirk just wanted a hug.
Spock, of course, finds this unbridled expression of emotion lacking in dignity. And sort of gross.
Final Notes:
Once Kirk was reassembled and all was well, Yeoman Rand has to face him on the bridge. He’s back to normal, but Janice has still been victimized (again). As he’s signing one of her forms, Spock creepily says, “That other captain…he had some….interesting qualities.”
No, Spock. Attempted rape isn’t an interesting quality. Don’t call me anymore.
And now, the Official Yeoman Rand Sexual Harassment Counter:
Yeoman Rand has been in four episodes and she’s been harassed or assaulted in all of them. I’ll be interested to contrast this with TNG when I get there (95 episodes from now, including Star Trek: The Animated Series).
Related Stuff:
Lisa Fary's earliest influences are Princess Leia, Rainbow Bright, Astronaut Barbie, and her 6th grade teacher, Ms. Palmer. She's angry that it's 2011 and she still doesn't have a hovercraft, but will accept a jetpack as consolation. That jetpack had better be pink with a rhinestone monogram. 
You are absolutely right about poor Yeoman Rand. She was under constant sexual assault. The sad thing is that at the time it wasn’t even a blip on anyone’s radar. We thought the guys were creepy and that evil Kirk was evil, but the term sexual harassment hadn’t even been heard of. Those were just the breaks of being a pretty woman in an action adventure show. Heck those were the breaks for a woman working in the real world. About two years after Star Trek TOS ended I got a job in a law library. One day one of the patrons, an older lawyer, cornered me in an isolated aisle and grabbed me and kissed me. All I could think was how was I giving off the wrong signals. I am glad times have changed.
I have to remind myself that this was all written and filmed in the 1960s because the stuff that happens to her is horrible and just gets brushed off. I can’t excuse it, but I should probably stop yelling at the TV.
When Evil Kirk is first seen, dramatically turning around on the transporter, it has to be one of the greatest shots of all time! LOL!
As far as “not all men have rapists held at bay inside their lizard brains,” I dunno. There definitely was a time in our past when rape wasn’t even a itee-bitee concept yet.
And I want those paintings in Rand’s quarters!
Hence Bad Kirk forcing himself on Janice being referred to as an “interesting quality”.
I’m there with you on Janice’s decor.
Oh my goodness, you are hilarious- I was stifling my laughter at work, “That’s not normal, you know. Most of us don’t have a rapist inside us.” and “No, Spock. Attempted rape isn’t an interesting quality. Don’t call me anymore.” Couldn’t agree more.