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Article by Shawn Deena
Shawn Deena is a writer, musician, gamer and all around comic book and sci-fi nerd. As lover of films and television he has entirely useless library of knowledge that has now been increased thanks to the large volume of movies and TV shows Netflix offers on their instant play. As someone who likes to share his opinion, having a forum where he can rant incessantly about things in entertainment that bother him, make him laugh or make him want to hit himself in the face with a DVD box is a good thing. Having written about everything from Office Depot chairs to the page turning excitement of CPA guidebooks nothing pleases him more than writing about the stuff he loves and knows. 13 Comments
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[...] I’m totally stupid, utterly clueless, mindlessly trivial – and totally screwed. (“Your death will be like bad science fiction.”) I’m going to go out begging for more life like my zombie parents do every day in [...]
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I'm actually really looking forward to "Red", starring Felicia Day as Little Red Riding Hood As a Werewolf Hunter. It seems like a really inspired idea – not to mention perfect casting – and is hopefully indicative of the kind of movies they'll continue to make.
I have to say, SciFi's miniseries — Alice, Tin Man, the Dune adaptations, etc. — are vastly superior to their movies. I'm really looking forward to Red, too, if only for Ms. Day and Kavan Smith and the werewolves.
Sharktopus = LOL! Kinna a good idea—but I can imagine how the Sci Fi channel will make it into an egregious, stinking pile of goo. Those cheap computer animation effects are mere microns away from Popeye cartoons! Really now—what are they thinking? This has been goin' on for some time now. If this crap is popular with young sci fi fans—LAWD HELP US! You never know, though—might inspire some future director's masterpiece. Still—shiver!
What makes it all the more egregious, to me, is that Syfy is capable of making good, original stuff, as evidenced by Tin Man and Alice (Tin Man I didn't like so much, but it looked great; surprisingly, I liked Alice). Then they turn around and give us Sharktopus, or this pile of ick Princess of Mars thing that's coming this week (sorry, but the words "Starring Traci Lords" doesn't inspire confidence – I don't care how good she looks in a Princess Leia metal bikini ripoff). Sadly, these movies must be making money for Syfy – if they weren't profitable, they would be doing it.
Yeah, Facebook for a change of direction, or better yet a new S/F channel run by S/Fpeople. Pink Ray Gun comes to mind.
The best argument for the SciFi (I don't use the new name either) original movies that I've heard is that they are, in effect, replacing the B-movie studio system that created all of the cheesy classics you mentioned. (Which were not, I should point out, any better quality than the SciFi originals when they were first released. They just have the benefit of quaintness and nostalgia now.) The low-budget studios just don't exist anymore, having been absorbed or driven out of business by Universal, MGM, Dreamworks, Disney, et al.
A lot of these crappy movies are directed by first-time directors and written by first-time writers. Are they high art? Certainly not. Are they scientifically plausible? Not even a little. But they're a relatively inexpensive way for newcomers in the film world to get on-the-job training while creating content for the SciFi Channel.
They're also a way for the network to show loyalty toward stars of their series by continuing to employ them in other projects. I think most of the actors from Stargate SG-1, BSG, and Eureka have done at least one by now, and they're pretty candid about their reasons. They have bills to pay and families to feed just like the rest of us. It's a paycheck, as well as an all-expenses-paid trip to Bulgaria or Romania or Australia or somewhere else they might not otherwise go. A working actor has to keep working, even if they can't always get the best roles.
Personally, I'm less concerned about the network's string of B-movie monsterfests than I am about the fact that they're abandoning their long-standing SciFi Friday lineup in favor of yet more professional wrestling. ::ptooie::
If we can get a few Plan 9s from this, it'll be worth it. The problem is that part will come farther down the road.
The wrestling disturbs me more, too, because at least very bad sci-fi is very bad sci-fi. Wrestling is not sci-fi.
I thought they had contracts with Skiffy taht required them to make some of these movies. Or something like that.
Let's be real. The cheesy sci fi movies they make have their charm, and don't take away from other quality content the channel makes. Stargate, Warehouse 13, Eureka, and Caprica are all quality shows in their own right. That's pretty damn good. Plus, like other people said, Dune and some others have rocked pretty hard. So bring on The Attack of the Amazing Shark-Hamster!
Side note: My favorite title for one of these suckers is Mansquito. I don't know why, but it makes me smile every time. XD
You forgot to mention "The lost treasures of the Grand Canyon" in which an Aztec civilisation is still going strong in the canyon and one of the gods is an over sized gargoyle. The combined hotness of Danie Jackson and Martouf couldn't make that watchable.
I'm happy they picked up Merlin. Classed the place up a bit