The Guild Season 3 Episode 5: Application’d
By WorldofHiglet
A big day for The Guild with S3 Ep5 coming out, the new Seasons 1&2 DVD retail release AND Felicia Day on the Late Night with Jimmy Fallon show. An earlier interview with is online on his website now.
So, what about today’s episode? Well, buckle up, me hearties – there’s changes afoot!
You can watch below, streaming on MSN video downloadable in HD from Xbox and also downloadable on Zune.
Disclaimer: this is a REVIEW and therefore will contain spoilers about this episode (and possibly previous ones). Just so we’re clear on that. [Note: I am ill. A lot. So if this is shorter than usual then it in no way reflects the awesomeness of the ep, only my capacity to type. Feel free to send me cookies and love via Twitter.]
First off, Codex is (gorgeously lit while) complaining about the “Asses of Anarchy” (snerk!) and their low stunt. She has been boning-up on Guild Leader skillz with her handy guide and has put up a notice looking for new Guild members. Anticipating all the wonderful people who will almost-certainly be queuing up to join the Knights of Good is taking the edge off the responsibilities of being Guild Leader. And she gets to be the one who chooses – surely this way there is no way for her to be rejected, even for an “…ego half-empty kind of girl…”?
Then we are all treated to a mixed bag of applicants to the Knights of Good. In fact these are actual applicants from the “Worst Applicant Ever” contest run by WatchTheGuild.com earlier in the year. Bladezz sums up the standard quite succinctly:
“That was a buffet of humanity I wish I hadn’t had to sample!”
Vork, stealing more wi-fi also has a low opinion of the candidates and states:
“I would not trust any of them with a gun in the event of a domestic insurgence.”
Codex is confused as to why this would be his standard, and he reveals that she barely passed muster. Clara liked the one who talked poetry, and is talking to them from the closet. She’s hiding from George:
“…I don’t know how to interact with him without a screen involved!”
This is a slightly odd thing to say, though, because we’ve never seen them interact via a screen unless it’s Clara berating him while playing the game. It’s clear that none of the choices is good, which leaves Codex desperate because they can’t complete the expansion pack without a full Guild – and she restates that Tink is not coming back
Vork is poised to criticize Codex’s handling of the situation when she suddenly grows a pair and tells him not to speak unless he’s going to take back the Guild Leader reins. Ooooh! And then she ruins the effect by pleading with him to come back.
Vork is momentarily taken aback but not fazed – he is not coming back as Guild Leader and is signing off because the wi-fi network he’s using (named ‘Scuzzbucket lick my pony butt’) is making him feel uncomfortable. Dena then makes a brief appearance (long enough to severely annoy Bladezz) and then enter stage left – Zaboo (sporting a natty ‘Legend of Neil’ tee shirt).
If Codex is surprised at Zaboo popping up in her bedroom (again) and calling her “ex-girlfriend” then this is quickly overtaken by his opening gambit: “..when you’re using handcuffs while fooling around you’re not supposed to leave the person tied up outside overnight…?” Surprisingly Codex has heard of this in some racy vampire literature (who knew she read that? What – no kilts?!?) but agrees this is not usually a good sign and tells Zaboo that if Riley is making him to things that make him uncomfortable he should stop.
This confuses Zaboo. Riley is so pretty and hot! And makes his genitals all warm! He’d have to be fool to not like that – but still…conundrum’d. Codex shows a refreshing lack of focus and returns to the problem of the new Guild member. And then it happens. Clara has a brainwave…
She exits the closet and returns to her usual station dragging a confused George with her: “Hey guys! Meet your new Guild mate.”
Everyone is surprised, not least George. Clara explains it will be a great way for them to be together. George had been imagining a different sort of ‘together’ possibly involving Salsa (dancing) or couples therapy, but Clara is not to be deflected from the promise of more gaming time. ‘Mr Wiggly’ will be his avatar name, and the fact that this is also Clara’s name for George’s ‘thing’ is something we can all be uncomfortable about. Clara pleads with him and George, as always, relents. I mean – how hard can it be? He used to play Pong back in the day….
George’s lack of gaming…anything, leads the Guild-mates to try to find a way to not have him on board but Codex is interrupted by the angry appearance of Riley in her bedroom. She is not happy that Zaboo escaped her clutches and pins him to the bed. Codex’s bed. When Codex mildly protests Riley tells her “..so watch or leave..”
Riley wants to know what Guild business has taken her prize away from her and when Zaboo (between kissage attacks) tells her that they are looking for a new player, Riley asks him if he wants her to play. Codex is horrified at the thought and hurriedly welcomes Wiggly onboard. Riley is none too pleased and a stand/sit off ensues. Awk..ward…
So, what have we learned? Tink has really, really gone, Clara has George wrapped around her little finger, Zaboo is under the heel (probably literally some of the time), Bladezz continues to hate his situation (and possibly his sister), Vork is still on the road and Codex might actually have started to take some independent actions. Quite an episode!
I love the way this season is shaping up – twists and turns all over the place, and a real sense that anything could happen. We have already lost a member, seemingly for good, and this means that all bets are off as to what the future holds. Can George shape up on the gaming front? Would that even be a good thing? I can’t imagine it’s going to end well…
WorldofHiglet is the online persona of writer Mary R. Higgins, a born-again geek reclaiming her heritage bit by bit. A youth filled with sci-fi, horror and adventure fare (TV, films, computer games and books) was crushed by years of office grind. Buffy brought her back into the fold after years of denial. Discovering Firefly sealed the deal. Now she geeks fulltime on her blog ‘the last geek bus home’ and her first novel ‘Turning left at Albuquerque” is currently looking for a home in publishing-land.
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Update: Felicia Day's interview with Jimmy Fallon is now on his website: http://www.latenightwithjimmyfallon.com/blogs/200...
Oh, goodness she's adorable. Pity we're on opposite coasts and can't hang out.
After the massive angst of last week, I'm glad to see a slightly lighter episode. The Zaboo-Riley dynamic continues to be worrisome, though. Consensual S&M is one thing. Bullying is quite another. And threatening to have sex on your neighbor's bed despite her objections? That's just rude.
On the one hand, I'm glad that George is willing to give The Game a go for the sake of his relationship with Clara. On the other, I'm rather sad that she's not willing to go dancing with him in return. (C'mon, Clara, salsa dancing!) It does mean that they don't need to find a sitter, but it also means that they're not really going to be spending any time face-to-face.
I think the Zaboo/Riley 'thing' will have to come to a conclusion soon – if Zaboo can get away from her, that is. Riley is so aggressive and, yes, rude…she reminds me of…Faulks? Now that *would* be a tempestuous relationship.
George is really forgiving to try the game for Clara and I don't think there's any chance Clara will reciprocate. Unless George really has as little skill as they fear – in which case she might use the Salsa dancing as a way to get him to stop playing!
I wonder why it is saying there are no comments here?
Forget what it's saying in the sidebar – if you can see comments, does it matter?
The site will be running under heavy caching for the next 31 days or so – we're expecting close to a million people on the site from now until Halloween, so little sidebar niceties like a comment count take the hit in order to accomadate all the website visitors having a responsive site across the board. Comment counts in the sidebar aren't a dynamic aspect of the site that stays up to date, unlike the comments section itself, which updates in real time.
It doesn't matter except I was wondering if Intense Debate was flaking again because I had a problem with it before with comments not showing up.
Sorry for coming across so tersely (didn’t even realize it until I just re-read my comment). Sometimes I just say what I’m thinking without couching it in nice-nice terms.
ID seems to be working fine – it’s just the disconnect between comment counts on a dynamic system (ID), and a cached, static one (cached Wordpress pages).
I didn't take it as terse, John, so no worries.
Not really a review. More like a description.