and while i definitely agree with alpha girl's sentiment (about the men on tv not being portrayed as catches, and that they're damn lucky to have gotten the girl), i still feel that at the end of the day, the message of the shows are almost always uplifting to men: men can be slobs, or lazy, or generally less attractive, or terrible husbands, or otherwise jerks, and it's okay. that's what makes them human! but so long as they have "good hearts," or occasional "good intentions," they deserve to be loved unconditionally. by their perfect wives. thus setting up the double standard that it's okay for men to be flawed in looks and personality and to get the girl who's completely out of his league, but for a woman…well, she should be perfect and look a certain way and be intelligent and motivated and attentive and maternal and sexy and etc. etc.,… thus contributing all the more to the impossible standard of perceived perfection that's already expected of women. gr.

now i feel i must get into the guild!

And yes, Eliza Dushku is reeeally skinny. She's awesome, and badass, and really smart, but I want to give her protein shakes or something. She looks great on camera, but remember that the camera adds 10 lbs. I saw her at a Dollhouse event in NYC, and she looked like she was standing on twigs.

I hate saying that, because making comments about "too skinny" is just as bad as making comments about "too fat" – but it just sucks that she's in an industry that values twigginess so much, when it's clear that the audience could give two craps. She'd be just as gorgeous with 10-15 more lbs on her, and I hope she knows that, despite her occupation.

Note, for instance that he asked Jewel Staite to fatten up for the role of Kaylee in Firefly, and she wasn't required to put it back on for Serenity, which is the reason she looks considerably thinner in the movie!

The sad thing is that it's the people with the purse-strings who want to keep TV homogeneous. It's only indie stuff like the aforementioned Guild which can dare to be different. 

Joss Whedon said that when he originally pitched Dollhouse, he wanted Dolls of all sizes, shapes, and ages. He said that different people had different fantasies and he wanted the dolls to reflect that. So his original vision had heavy dolls and senior citizen dolls.

The network said no. They all had to be young and fit.

By the by, Miracle is from Hawaii. I don't know how much of her ethnicity is native/Polynesian, but probably some.

I would like to think that TV (or film) is going to grow up one day and be reflective of it's audience, but I just don't see that happening atm. They will never change without a reason because change is hard and scary and might not work.

In the end I think it will be webseries like The Guild that will force change because as they become more available and mainstream more people will want to watch them because they are about, and populated by, people like them.

@ George – I just wish the reverse could be true, you know? We mention Roseanne, but Roseanne wasn't married to a hot dude. She was married to a similarly large dude. And while I loved that show, and thought it was a true representation of life, women don't get a fantasy life on TV the way men do. There's no female equivalent of "this chick is lucky to have him." Like having someone like Robin Thorsen from The Guild (http://www.watchtheguild.com/images/Headshots/Rob... married to someone like Tamoh Penikett.

Actually, The Guild does that really well. Robin Thorson's character, Clara, is married to a pretty buff, attractive dude. Of course, she doesn't pay much attention to him or her kids because of her gaming, but still…

But as far as fat men being more acceptable goes, I think it's two things:

1) while everyone has body image issues, women are more vocal about theirs more often, so everyone imagines that EVERY woman wants to be thin where men just don't care. It's not that man-fat is really more acceptable, it's that the myth that all women want to be a size -1 is so prominent that a woman not actively, vocally striving to get or remain a size -1, is virtually inconceivable on TV;

and 2) men are thought to be so shallow that they would never be interested in a woman who isn't blonde and skinny unless they have some sort of fetish.

The skinny guy/big girl dynamic has always been played as a joke in the movies and TV, sort of like how stupid comedies will just throw in an old mute Asian person to make people laugh, or how the thing in indie hipster comedies of the last few years is to stick in a tall African dude as a quirky visual gag. So when it's not portrayed as a joke, people still look for the joke in it.

I don't think it's that men GET to be choosy so much as women are supposed to be the only ones able to see past the superficial. THAT is where women are shown in a better light than men. Ladies can see through Kevin James' or Seth Rogen's chubby oafishness to see the really awesome guy inside… but men are incapable of extending that to women without some sort of dirty ulterior motive. That's not fair either.

They're all probably afraid to bring in a bigger woman as the lead actress because they're paranoid the audience will consider it a rip-off of "Roseanne." It's a shame they don't get that as long as the writing is good, the ratings will follow. Hopefully as time passes, they'll get their heads out of their collective asses and realize that talent comes in all shapes and sizes.

Very good job on the article, Teresa…

Meanwhile, big girls can’t be big on screen without it being the central purpose of the show or constantly brought up, i.e. Ugly Betty, Drop Dead Diva, Less Than Perfect. It’s like there needs to be a sub-clause to the Bechdel rule: (1) a show should have women who (2) are in situations about something (3) other than weight/ body image.

For the record, I would totally go for Kevin James. But, not Hurley.

Flattery will get you everywhere.

Love,
Teresa

One example I was thinking of as a perfect balance is Hurley on Lost. His weight is mentioned, but mostly by him. Even when Charlie would "make fun of him", it was for a serious reason, like trying to protect him. Sawyer took potshots, but he took potshots at EVERYONE. AND, Hurley got to have a thin, hot, blond girlfriend on the island.

Then again, there's the issue that it's more acceptable for a guy to be fat than a woman. The King of Queens, Kevin James, can have a hot wife on his show. Hell, going all the way back to Ralph Kramden on The Honeymooners – fat husband/thin, attractive wife is a common thing. This extends beyond TV. Seeing an overweight guy with a skinny girlfriend isn't as shocking as seeing an overweight woman with a skinny boyfriend.

Somewhere along the way, men got the right to be choosy, while women are expected to look beyond looks. I don't know why that is, but it doesn't seem fair.

I'll ignore your comment about Oprah.