My Geek Doesn’t Go on Summer Hiatus

By Lisa Fary

This summer isn’t quite the wasteland of reality TV that previous summers have been. Don’t get me wrong, I’m kinda enjoying I’m A Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here (and am totally hating myself for it) and am eagerly awaiting Big Brother 11. But, there is actually quite a bit of genre programming going on this summer.

Here they are, in order of appearance:

The Listener (Thursdays at 10PM)

This was the pitch for NBC’s The Listener: Imagine Matt Parkman from Heroes, but actually performing good deeds with his ability. Stars a kid who looks like Gabriel Byrne and Jake Gyllenhaal had a baby.

Lisa’s Snotty Verdict: If I hadn’t been so beaten up by Heroes, I would have been more willing to watch, but after being so mistreated, I don’t want to get involved.

True Blood (Premieres June 14)

Dare I say HBO’s True Blood is the best vampire anything ever filmed? I risk the wrath of the Twilight bunch, I know, but this show is hands down awesome.  Check out Teresa Jusino’s column on the series from last summer.

Lisa’s Snotty Verdict: Must watch!

Impact (June 21 and 28)

If Swine Flu or terrorists don’t get you, astronomical debris will wipe out humanity.

Impact is a mini-series airing on ABC later this month starring Natasha Henstridge, Steven Culp, James Cromwell, and meteor shower. A meteor shower. . . . OF DOOM.

According to the description from ABC, the meteor shower is carrying a brown dwarf (a dead star) with it, which slams into the moon, sending it on a collision course with Earth. The world has 39 days to stop the moon or Earth, or all of mankind will perish. After a failed attempt by the United States to destroy the moon, the scientific team works together to mount an international mission to the moon.

Why the writers should have Googled “science”: A brown dwarf isn’t a dead star. A white dwarf is a dead star, but it wouldn’t move freely with a meteor shower (I think). A brown dwarf is a substellar object that never had the juice to be a star. Don’t even get me started on the stupidity of trying to destroy the moon. I’m not even a scientist – just a science fangirl – and I can come up with better science within the space of a few minutes.

Lisa’s Snotty Verdict: Rip off of Steven Baldwin’s Earthstorm, without the novelty of Dirk Benedict.

Merlin (Premieres June 21)

NBC borrows this series from the BBC for the summer. It’s a teenaged Merlin in Camelot with Anthony Head as Uther Pendragon.

Lisa’s Snotty Verdict: I dig Arthurian legends and have more faith in the BBC than in NBC. I’ll give it a go and hope it’s at least as enjoyable as Robin Hood. However, Robin Hood was helped quite a bit by the very dreamy Richard Armitage as Guy of Gisborne.

The Next Doctor (June 27)

The first of two Doctor Who specials on BBC America, but don’t get too excited. The other Doctor in this isn’t the real next Doctor, Matt Smith. It’s going to be David Tenant, David Morrissey and a couple of sonic screwdrivers at Christmas in 1851 London.

Lisa’s Snotty Verdict: I’m kind of tired of David Tenant.

Warehouse 13 (Premieres July 7)

The Sci Fi Channel – er, excuse me, SyFy – makes it’s first attempt at a new original series since Battlestar Galactica. With Warehouse 13, they take a lighter approach in the story of Secret Service agents charged with finding artifacts for a secret government facility.

Lisa’s Snotty Verdict: Luckily for SyFy, my expectations for anything it does are incredibly low for shows that don’t profess to hold the secret to our existence. I may be the only person in America who watched the entire season of Flash Gordon.

Meteor (July 12 and 19)

Not to be outdone by ABC in the schmaltzy astronomical disaster department, NBC brings us its own crappy miniseries featuring a giant rock, and assumedly, bad science, hurtling towards Earth. Don’t forget, no matter how safe you feel, there is always a space rock racing toward you.

Lisa’s Snotty Verdict: Rent Armageddon.

Torchwood: Children of Earth (Premieres July 20)

Finally. I’ve been waiting for this forever. Torchwood is only back for five nights, so don’t expect any new team members to replace Tosh and Owen, but expect some Captain Jack/ Ianto lovin’.

Lisa’s Snotty Verdict: At NYCC, I waited in a crazy long line to sit in the back row of the Torchwood panel. Until recently, the Torchwood theme was my ringtone. I cannot wait for this. I want it to be July 20th now.

Being Human (Premieres July 25)

A vampire, a werewolf, and a ghost are roommates in this BBC America series. Sounds like Friends with a paranormal twist.

Lisa’s Snotty Verdict: As long as the roommates don’t get all emo about their conditions, I’m game.

Planet of the Dead (July 26)

And the second Doctor Who special of the summer. Still no Matt Smith that we know of, but there is a bus ride to an alien world and that chick who did such a lousy job as the new Bionic Woman on NBC.

Lisa’s Snotty Verdict: Now I’m really tired of David Tenant.

Never miss an update. Subscribe to Pink Raygun by Email or subscribe via RSS

Lisa Fary’s early exposure to classic Battlestar Galactica in 1979 is largely responsible for her lifelong interest in science fiction and her childhood ambition of being an intergalactic space cowgirl. She thinks diagramming sentences is a fun alternative to Sudoku.

Related articles by Zemanta

• Merlin to Meteor: It’s a Sci Fi Summer on NBC (sfuniverse.com)
• SyFy orders PHANTOM movie (newsarama.com)
• Battlestar Galactica: not so frakking feminist. (slate.com)