Stargate Atlantis: Identity

By Wolfen Moondaughter

I have to admit, I was braced for this one to be a terrible experience, considering that it’s another episode where Keller is both a fairly major player (though thankfully not until the latter half) and a plot device (well, half of one). It therefore turned out to actually be fairly decent — maybe not my fave of Carl Binder’s eps, or even a fave in general, but better than many of his, and certainly better than I’d hoped it would be, so I can’t complain. And let’s face it, getting the thief, Neeva, in lieu of Keller for a while was a relief! I have to say I didn’t much care for the end, though — and no, it wasn’t really the McKeller bit that upset me — not directly. But I’ll get to that when we reach that point. At any rate, Carson somehow seemed a bit wasted here, mostly just a fill-in because Keller couldn’t be the doctor rather than being there for himself. At least it was something of a team ep, if not exactly a prime example.

5.18: “Identity”

A lost-looking woman wanders around Atlantis, ending up in a lab. Zelenka comes in and spots her; he asks if she’s looking for Rodney. (Gee, it’s a bit hard to think of how this scene would have felt if I didn’t already have a good idea of what he situation was. This is one instance where I actually wish I wasn’t spoiled. Knowing what’s going on, though, for a moment I find myself wondering if it wouldn’t have been better to have us see Keller instead, so that there’s more of a mystery. But then I suppose there’s something to be said for doing it this way, especially for the sake of the latter half of the story, after we learn for sure that a switch has been made. And there’s certainly a precedent for it being done this way in he franchise: that’s how the body-swapping in SG-1 had been portrayed visually in “Avalon” and “Crusade”.) The woman doesn’t seem to know who Radek’s talking about when he mentions Rodney. He points out that she seems confused, asking if she’s ill, but she unconvincingly says that she’s fine. Thinking that she should sit down, he moves to radio Rodney, but she nervously says that he doesn’t need to. Insisting again that she should sit down, he reaches for her — and she stabs him in the gut with a pair of pliers! (I scream, and live in fear for a while that they’ve actually killed the character.) The woman looks at her reflection for a moment — and sees Keller looking back at her! (Note that the woman’s lips are open in surprise, but Keller’s lips are closed. Hello, continuity!) The woman hurries off, leaving Radek bleeding on the floor. (NOOOOO! I sit there through the commercials, trying to remember if David Nykl had said anything about his character being in the final episode when I saw him at Dragon*Con, and, happily, reach a point where I think I do remember there being something. Still, it’s not concrete, so I remain in a state of panic for a bit. Incidentally, if I haven’t said it before, Nykl is an absolute sweetheart, one of the nicest celebs I have ever met!)

The strange woman wanders around Atlantis, looking fidgety. She wanders out onto a balcony and tosses the pliers. As she walks back in, she notes her reflection again. (Much better symmetry this time!) Rodney finds her, saying that he’s been looking all over for her and calling her; he asks if her radio isn’t working. He reaches for it, and she grabs his wrist; perplexed, he says he just wants to check her earwig (earwig?? — I thought it was an earbud, earwig makes me think of the horrible insect) and gently pulls it free from her hair. (Okay, even with her looking wary and unwelcoming, even with her drawing away, somehow, to me, this character has a thousand times more chemistry with McKay than Keller has ever had. And it can’t be blamed simply on my not liking McKeller, because I had liked Keller in the beginning, and if I felt that this woman had no chemistry with Rodney either, I would certainly say so — I have no reason to want the bad guy to have chemistry with him, and every reason to want Keller to, now don’t I? Yet that’s not how it actually plays out for me ….)

Rodney suggests that the battery’s dead and starts to walk off, suggesting they hurry to lunch, before the schnitzel’s gone. (I love how most of McKay and Keller’s interactions revolve around meals. *Snicker*) As they walk, he asks what happened to her, saying she was supposed to meet him a half-hour ago. (I like that he seems more normal right now than he typically is with Keller, save for the scene in the last ep — not overly-friendly, yet not exactly cranky, either. If they could keep him like this even with the real Keller, I might be more receptive, like I was last ep.) Stopping, he notes that she seems distracted and asks if something’s wrong. He amends it, asking if he did something wrong. When she doesn’t answer, he decides, dejected, that he must have, and asks what it was. (Awwww. Poor guy — does Keller make him paranoid like this all the time? Is he always wondering what he’s done wrong? It’s hard to imagine the McKay of a few seconds ago doing something wrong, though! If we could see signs of her worrying that she’s upset/insulted him more often, the playing field more level, I’d feel a bit better about them being together, at least — which is again why I liked the scene in the middle of the previous ep so well, while many others found her whiny in that bit. Happily, the very last scene in this ep addresses that very concern, somewhat ….)

The woman starts to reply that he hasn’t done anything, that she’s not — and then her radio, in Rodney’s hand, activates. It’s Marie, calling Keller. Perplexed and a bit annoyed, Rodney tells Marie just a sec and hands the radio over to the woman, saying “It’s for you!” and that it’s apparently working fine. (*Snicker* Glad to see him being a bit catty with Keller, even if it’s not really her!) Marie informs them that she’s calling about Zelenka. Rodney interrupts with an eyeroll, tapping his radio and asking what’s wrong, assuming the man simply has a migraine or something; the woman interrupts in turn, saying that Zelenka’s been stabbed. Rodney’s bemused expression melts into a frown of concern (awww) and he asks what she means. He shares a worried look with “Keller” as Marie explains; when she’s done, he promises that they’ll be there in a minute and hurries off. (*Squee* Finally, Rodney showing concern for Radek! Too bad it gets spoiled at the end …)

When they arrive at the infirmary, Marie rattles off a lot of medical jargon at them; Rodney asks if that means Radek’s going to die; Marie says that the man needs immediate surgery. “Keller” is understandably unresponsive; Rodney asks her what’s wrong, and she says it’s nothing, she needs to get ready. Marie practically has to shove her onward. Rodney looks worried — and suspicious. (Not that he thinks she isn’t who she seems to be, just that something’s wrong that she’s not saying, methinks.) “Keller” makes a slow approach to the operating theatre and, after accepting a scalpel, takes another look at herself (in a video monitor, this time). She announces that she’s not feeling well, telling the others to take over; she intends to lie down. Rodney watches her leave, dumbfounded. (Nice tension! I’m was both eager to see how the hell she’s going to get out of this and feeling very worried for Zelenka the whole time. Bit of a fizzle of a resolution, though, but then I don’t know how else she could have gotten out of it ….)

We see Sheppard and McKay walk into Woolsey’s office together, side by side. (*Squee* A small “John and Rodney Show” moment!) Rodney informs Woolsey that the surgeons have stopped Zelenka’s bleeding, but the man’s lost a lot of blood; John tells us that Zelenka is in a coma. (!!! Okay, so he might live … or, if the writers are feeling particularly cruel, he might die. Never can tell with this lot …) Rodney says, looking shaken, that Zelenka should recover, though, barring any complications. Woolsey says (in what could be scandalised, or could be just amazed, tones) that he’d heard Keller hadn’t performed the surgery. Rodney confirms it, explaining that she wasn’t feeling well — but also mentioning how he’d found her wandering the halls seeming lost and confused, as well as how she’d seemed like she’d never held a scalpel before. (And people accuse him of being unobservant and only focused on himself! Good for you, Rodney!) Woolsey says that Beckett is due back, so he’ll have the man look at Keller, to make sure she isn’t sick and doesn’t have a parasite. Rodney looks even more downtrodden at this suggestion. (Well, at least you know how to treat it this time, if it is that parasite .…) Woolsey wants them to pull out all the stops to find out who put one of their people in a coma. “Light coma,” Rodney corrects mildly; John shoots him an annoyed but bemused look. (And here we go again with having Rodney be petty in a way that should be beyond him now, after five years of character growth, all for the sake of a joke — and a not-very-funny one, at that. Can’t we have Rodney stay sympathetic at least until Radek wakes up? Well, maybe this was Binder’s way of saying Radek really would be fine, I don’t know. Or maybe we’re supposed to see it as Rodney being petty to hide his worry, but it just doesn’t read that way to me, if that’s what it’s meant as ….) Woolsey stresses that he wants to know who’s responsible.

We see the woman going through Keller’s things. (How did she find out where her room is? That could have been awkward: “Excuse me, can you tell me where my quarters are? I have temporary amnesia.” *Snicker*) She finds a picture of Keller, from the woman’s graduation; in it, Keller is standing with a man. (I would have thought it was Keller’s father, but Mallozzi called him her “creepy uncle” — and it’s really writer Carl Binder himself!) The woman studies the photo, then herself in the mirror, asking herself what the hell is going on. The door opens just them, revealing Ronon, who’s looking rather predatory. He says that he’d heard she wasn’t feeling well; she gives him a terse no, confirming it. He asks if he can come in, she tells him, reluctantly, “All right ….” An awkward conversation ensues, him trying to determine what’s wrong, slowly approaching, very intense (and creepy!), while she slowly backs away. He says things like she’s pushing herself too hard; she agrees. She’s trying to assuage his worries when Rodney interrupts, standing in the door. (Some interesting things going on here. First, Ronon seems to have figured out, or at least vaguely suspect, that Keller’s literally not herself, and he hasn’t even seen her yet since she’d gotten body-swapped! Either it’s just his intuitive nature compounded with his street smarts, or he knows her better than even Rodney does. Also, if he doesn’t actually suspect yet that she’s not herself, it’s odd that he would go check up on her, given how things went down between them and how uncomfortable he’s making her — it paints him as a creepy stalker again. Argh. And second, I find it odd that Rodney would feel the need to stay in the doorway rather than come in when it seems his girlfriend is being bothered by a guy that, as we later learn, she doesn’t much care to be around. If they’re dating, shouldn’t he be more territorial and protective? Well, at least there’s a note of warning in his voice when he says “Hi”, and he doesn’t really seem to feel threatened, secure in his knowledge that Keller does indeed like him, not Ronon ….)

With a bemused smile, Rodney strolls in and, after confirming that everything is fine, informs “Keller” that Beckett is on his way back and will be able to fill in for her. (He trails off awkwardly at the end and keeps throwing annoyed glances at Ronon. Perhaps he’s not so confident after all ….) He informs her that they’ve sent a puddle-jumper for Carson, as the village he’s at is too far from the ‘Gate to walk back quickly. (Not a very good excuse for introducing her to the concept of ‘jumpers — wouldn’t it have been better to say that the place Carson’s gone to most recently only has a space ‘Gate? I mean, Keller’s been off-world without Carson swooping in to replace her; what’s the hurry now?) Of course the woman doesn’t know what a ‘jumper is, and tries to veil her interest in it. Rodney seems to realise that she is indeed acting strangely still, while Ronon eyes her speculatively; they share a glance that says they both acknowledge that something’s up. Rodney suggests to Ronon that they should maybe leave and let her rest. (I assume this is code for “Let’s talk in the hall,” but apparently not.) Ronon leaves; Rodney lingers and, looking very worried, tells her to call him if she needs anything, then reluctantly leaves. (*Squee!* I love that expression on him!)

We see the woman being scanned in the infirmary. Carson tells Woolsey and Rodney that everything about her seems fine, including her bloodwork. He asks the woman how long she’s been feeling this way; she tells him a day or so. He asks if she’s been sleeping all right; she says no, she’s been pushing herself too hard. (the actress does a wonderful job of sounding like she’s giving the answer with the impression that its by rote rather than by personal knowledge!) Rodney gets a thoughtful, puzzled look and turns to Woolsey. (I wonder if Keller hasn’t really been pushing herself, and Ronon made that up as a test?) Carson says that he’ll give her something to sleep and monitor her condition, hoping she’ll be back to normal in the morning. (I get the feeling he’s not being honest here ….) He walks off with Rodney and Woolsey, saying that she’s fine — physically speaking; if she has a problem, it’s psychological. (Ah, so he wasn’t exactly truthful, even if he’s only got the vaguest inkling that something is indeed wrong.)

That night, the woman sneaks out of the infirmary. She asks someone in the hall for directions on how to get to the puddle-jumper. (So is he the one person in the city who has never seen Keller? Has he never been sick or injured? If he has, since she just came from the infirmary, shouldn’t he figure she’d know how to get to the tower from there, seeing as they have to go that way for emergencies fairly frequently?) The woman gets to a ‘jumper, snags a pistol from a case, and takes a gander at the controls. Rodney finds her fiddling with the controls and asks her, in friendly but puzzled tones, what she’s doing. She claims that she couldn’t sleep, and so she decided to go for a ride. (I would think that would be reason enough for him to strong-arm her back to the infirmary right that very moment ….) He points out that she doesn’t have the gene to fly it; she asks if he can. He says she knows he can, but really, she should go back to the infirmary. She asks him to take her for a ride, to help her to relax; he says he thought Carson gave her pills for that. She says they didn’t work, then walks him back over to the controls, asking seductively for him to take her to the mainland, so they can make love under the stars. She asks if he’d like that; surprised, he says yeah, but he needs to get a blanket because of his allergies. (On the one hand, this scene paints Rodney as incredibly thick in the head and unobservant, but on the other, damn they’re hot together!! And his innocent quality is rather endearing — rather like Jeff Murdoch, on Coupling. Still, how would getting to the mainland server her? Did she not notice the Stargate on her way to the ‘jumper bay? So in one way, this scene is my fave in the ep, but even it has some big flaws.)

She tries to get him to just go, but common sense gets the better of him, and he insists that she should go back to the infirmary. She counters that she’d rather be with him; he gets a bit prudish, but she keeps trying. (And even with him pulling away, they have at tonne more chemistry than McKay and the real McKeller! *Snicker* At this point, they very much remind me of Danny Kaye and Vera-Ellen in White Christmas, during the fireside chat ….) Rodney gets fed up and tells her to stop, saying that he doesn’t know what’s wrong but she’s clearly not herself. (Bravo to Rodney for not taking advantage of what she freely offers, under the circumstances!) He reaches for her, saying that he’s taking her back to the infirmary; she pulls away. He gets more forceful; she shoves at him. He talks to her the way one talks to a rabid dog, then tries to grab her quickly; she struggles free and pulls a gun on him. (Very nice parallel to the scene with Zelenka! Ooh, come to think of it, Keller and Zelenka would have made a cute couple, probably …. Hmm? Whuzzat? Oh, yeah, sorry, got a little sidetracked. *Cough*) He looks down the barrel, wide-eyed, as she tells him that he should have taken her on that ride. Ronon blasts her from behind, just in time. (How the heck did he know to be there?? What reason does Ronon have to hang out in the ‘jumper bay? I guess he’s been following her all this time?) Rodney is too stunned to even say “thank you.”

We see the woman in the isolation room, with Woolsey, Sheppard, Carson, Rodney, and Teyla looking down from the observation deck — Ronon is revealed as being in the back as the scene progresses “I don’t care what the scans say; either she’s suffered a serious mind-altering brain trauma, or some kind of entity has taken control of her!” Woolsey insists. Teyla asks if Keller’s suffered any injuries; Rodney replies that she was fine until yesterday, as far as he knows. Carson, irritated, insists that the scans would have picked up such a trauma or an alien entity. Ronon protests that an organism could be good at hiding; Sheppard agrees, reminding them how Keller hadn’t been able to pick up the parasite in Rodney’s head at first either. (Awwww. Nice to have Sheppard be the one to think of that. *Mini McShepper squee*) Carson insists that they shouldn’t rule out a psychological event, pointing out the stress of their job, which can lead to different types of dissociative disorders. (Which would fit well with Keller’s saying in the past, in multiple instances, that she feels inadequate there …. Wait, shouldn’t this woman and Keller have different brainwave patterns? It seems to me that such a thing has been used to determine that someone was possessed or under mind control before. Well, maybe it was another sci-fi series ….) “Disorders? She tried to kill me!” Rodney protests, then proceeds to argue with Carson, insisting that she would indeed have pulled the trigger. (You could tell she would kill you, but couldn’t tell it wasn’t her, no matter how oddly she acted? Does that mean you could believe Keller would kill you?) Then he suddenly puts two and two together, suggesting that she’s actually the one who stabbed Zelenka. “Dr Keller?” Teyla asks; Ronon says the woman down there is not her, that he agrees with Woolsey. (If the writers want me to believe that McKay and Keller are a better couple, they should stop making it look like Ronon’s the one with the deepest connection to her ….) Teyla asks how they can find out; Sheppard suggests that they start by asking her.

A scene later, Sheppard, Rodney, Woolsey, and Carson are gathered around the woman, who is strapped to a bed. (Kinky!) Sheppard is direct, asking the woman who the hell she is. She gives a confused “What?” Woolsey points out that if she really is Keller, she’ll know Keller’s personal details. She tries to deflect, starting by saying she knows she’s been acting strange. Rodney cuts her off, telling her lowly that the real Keller wouldn’t point a gun at him, and certainly wouldn’t stab Zelenka. (I love how he gets a little choked up on the Zelenka accusation!) They prod her verbally several times, and after a long, tense moment, she says it was self-defence. They scoff at this; she explains that Radek had tried to grab her and that she’d been afraid of being caught. (Ah, so she’s not actually keeping up the pretence of being Keller! I thought she was, for a minute there …) Woolsey points out that she has been caught and advises her to come clean. She admits that her name is Neeva Casol and says that she has no idea how she got into Keller’s body. She says that she was searching through some artifacts in a village one minute, and found herself there in Atlantis the next. McKay asks her what artefacts, clearly having a theory. She explains that she and her associates go around the galaxy acquiring valuables; Sheppard figures she means she steals them. Ignoring his comment, she says that they’d heard about a world with a collection of ancestral atrefacts; they’d gone to the place and broken in.

We see a flashback of Neeva and her friends in the act of stealing; she uncovers a device much like the one Daniel and Vala had used in SG-1. She says to leave it, but then finds stones that look to fit within it, and decides to try it. (Why? She’s in a hurry and it’s too big to carry — what, is there some sort of compulsion aspect to the stones, like with bubble-wrap? See hole, insert peg?) Suddenly she finds herself in Keller’s body. (Note that this works differently than the device in SG-1, which only put one person’s mind inside another person’s, and didn’t actually switch them. Of course, those same stones did allow ATA gene-carriers to see out of each other’s eyes without any actual swapping, and without the stones needing to actually be set into the device. At any rate, Mallozzi confirms that this device is not exactly the same as the one we’ve already been made familiar with. I guess like computers can serve differing purposes. And this allows them to reuse a prop without having to go with the exact same story, and yet still offers some background for the characters to rely on ….) Neeva finishes by saying she doesn’t know how she got there, but she only hurt Zelenka as a gut reaction to being threatened, and means them no further harm. (Funny, but I believe her, somewhat. It makes sense for her default to be “kill” living the life she leads. Hell, Ronon can get like that at times — I think that, if not for Sheppard keeping him in check, he could be even worse.)

Later, Woolsey, Carson, and Sheppard pile into Rodney’s lab. (Wow, I wonder if it was creepy for him to work in there, knowing what happened to Zelenka in that room!) Rodney says that Neeva’s story rang a bell for him; he pulls up the file on a similar device that SG-1 had run across a few years ago. Woolsey remembers, but Rodney has to fill Sheppard and Carson in. Sheppard asks why it connected Neeva to Keller; Rodney relates, over a flashback, how, a few weeks ago, Keller was hanging out with him while he was cataloguing stuff in the secret lab he and Daniel had found. We see Keller whinging to a busy Rodney that they’re going to miss the start of Doctor No; he tells that he’s almost done . (Okay, now I get what people mean about her whinging. It hadn’t really bothered me until now, but I really can’t stand people who do things like that. If you want to see the movie so badly, go yourself, lady! Let the man do what he enjoys! To me, loving someone means never expecting them to do what you want to do, and always wanting them to follow their own bliss.) She adds that she doesn’t want to get stuck behind Ronon again, like last week. (Wow, she seemed kind of … well, bitchy there, like a “mean girl”. And to think she seemed to like Ronon once! Not to mention that Ronon’s saved her life and everyone else’s on multiple occasions. And he trained her very well in self-defence! Granted, I imagine things are awkward between them after she turned him down for Rodney, and he was an arse to her on the Daedalus, but I can’t imagine Ronon to be the type to cause scenes — he’s too quiet. I would think he would be more likely to avoid them. And was she not his friend when he trained her?) He says he knows, he knows. (Ohmigods, I just flashbacked to my old roommates just then. Theirs was not a happy story, either ….) She laments that all the popcorn will be gone. (Because of Teyla, I bet *Snicker*) As she pouts she sees a box and opens it, finding two stones like the one Neeva used inside. (I’m shocked that Rodney hasn’t drilled it into her not to touch anything! While she checks it out, Rodney rambles about wanting to make a personal shield device with the plans he found. (Yeah, because that worked so well for you in the past. *Snicker*) He notices her holding a stone and freaks a little, saying that they haven’t catalogued it yet. (That’s his only reason for not wanting her to touch it? How about she could very well touch something dangerous?) She apologises. “What did we say about that?” he says. (Oh, so I guess he gets his turns to treat her like a child. Yes, such a healthy relationship …. Well, on the one hand, yeah, I’d want someone “better” for Rodney — just as I’m sure a number of her fans understandably and rightly want better for her — but on the other, it is a relief to see she can be the imperfect, misbehaving one in the relationship, the one who “needs correcting”, once in a while. I mean, sure, I’d rather neither of them need to be chastised, but if it’s got to happen, let it be both of them who needs it, in turn!)

Back in the present, Rodney is showing the guys the stones, figuring these are the stones that interact with the terminal. Woolsey asks how it could have worked for Keller without her having the gene; Rodney figures they had been initialised by someone who did, and she happened to be the last person to touch it. (Mighty convenient, that. I wonder why they bother with needing the Ancient gene for anything if anyone can use it after it’s initialised. In fact, why would anything that required the gene in the first place ever be usable by someone without it?) Woolsey remembers that the other device had been difficult to turn off; Rodney confirms that there’s a lot of unanswered questions about how it works. (He didn’t ask you how it works, he said it was hard to turn off — to which it would make mores sense to reveal how it did eventually get turned off, I should think ….) Sheppard asks if Keller’s mind is in Neeva’s body. (Well, going by what they know, they should assume that Keller is asleep in the backseat of her own mind — that’s how it worked before.) Rodney doesn’t know, but figures that’s probably how it works. (Why does he figure that, given their history with the device?) Woosley says the question then is: “Where is Dr Keller?”

We see Keller then, in a nice leather-n-lace number, sitting in a cell, looking at a reflection of Neeva. A man arrives outside her cell; she asks if he’s contacted Atlantis. He hasn’t; instead, he’s contacted other trading partners and learned that Neeva has committed far worse crimes in other places than the ones she stands accused of there and now — including five murders on her own and more with her accomplices. Keller tries to impress upon him her situation, but he cuts her off, saying that she’s supposedly a very capable liar. (Geez, even if she is, what harm will it do you to check out her story, guy? Only delay the inevitable? Do you have so little faith in your men to think they can’t hold her if there’s a delay? Further, think of the harm you do yourselves if she’s right, and you kill her! This part of the story just doesn’t work for me.) As magistrate, he gives her a death sentence for all the crimes she’s committed here and elsewhere in the Coalition. (He has the authority to try her for crime on other worlds? And without a trial, no less? How convenient! Actually, were they shown as a more primitive society, I could buy it, but even Atlantis got a trial with three members of the Coalition chosen to represent the whole!) He informs her that she’s to be executed the next day; Keller is left understandably shocked and horrified. (I do feel sorry for her — what a frightening prospect!)

Meanwhile, Sheppard’s team convene in the meeting room with Carson (yay!) and Woolsey. Rodney and John inform Woolsey that their only option is to go to the planet and destroy the device — which Rodney hasn’t actually figured out how to do yet. Carson impresses a sense of urgency upon the plan, saying that, from what he’s studied of the SG-1 reports (shouldn’t that be SGC?), it seems that, if Neeva’s body should be killed, Keller’s mind will go with it. (Come again? That’s not exactly how it worked before! When Daniel and Vala’s host’s bodies were under duress, their own bodies felt it, and when Vala’s host’s body temporarily died, her own, back home, did as well. So not only should Keller’s mind die, by that logic, but her own body should, too!) Rodney looks ill as he realises that this means they’d be stuck with Neeva in Keller’s body. (While that does make some sense in its own right, there’s nothing in SG-1’s experience with the device that would suggest that!) Ronon says that they need to get a move on; Woolsey agrees, asking if they know where to go. John promises that they will.

A scene later, Neeva tells them that she’d be happy to guide them, on one condition. Rodney starts to tell her she’s in no position to bargain, when John shocks him by cutting him off, asking her what the condition is. She says they have to agree not to pursue her or her accomplices. (It’s hard to believe that she’s all bad when she includes the welfare of her accomplices in that — she has some sense of friendship and loyalty, then? Well, maybe she just finds them too valuable of assets to lose.) Sheppard agrees. Then she demands a puddle-jumper as well. McKay is outraged. (Not to mention, what part of it can’t be flown without the ancient gene did she miss??) She says that she’s seen how many they have — they have more than enough. (Not really, considering how they go through them; they’ve lost at least three this season alone!) Sheppard says she’s not getting anything; she tries then for weapons and fails, finally agreeing to accept simply not being pursed as the trade. (I love the little look McKay and Sheppard exchange, with Rodney looking at him like he’s asking telepathically if John’s sure about this or something. *Squee!*)

John, Ronon, Rodney, Carson, Teyla, and Neeva arrive on the planet, with Sheppard, Ronon, and Teyla all battle-ready. Neeva says it’ll take a couple of hours to get to the village, which of course gets Rodney whinging that she could have said so before. (Yeah, they could have taken one of the ‘jumpers she wanted a ride in so badly! *Snicker*) Sheppard points out, fairly patiently, that they couldn’t fly a jumper through the forest anyway. (Uh so the village has no clearing? You couldn’t fly over the trees? I dunno, it seems to me that always having a place to hide out or a means of a quick getaway is the best policy, and a ‘jumper is both.) Teyla adds that the Daedalus is currently on Earth. (Actually, that begs an interesting question: does the Daedalus ever actually land? At any rate, this seems an odd comment; how would the Daedalus effect the story, whether it was there or not? It’s not like they could beam Jennifer up in Neeva’s body, so it wouldn’t much affect the jeopardy, save maybe for when Neeva gets shot in Keller’s body, later — and even that wouldn’t have made much of a difference to the story if they’d been able to beam her aboard right away. At best, maybe they could have figured out the coordinates of the execution site later, but even then, they could have simply been beamed over too late ….) Rodney clarifies that he could have brought more powerbars and water, and better insoles. (Uh, why not do that already, just in case?) “He complains a lot,” Neeva notes. “Only when he’s awake,” John replies. (*Snicker*) “Yet he and doctor Keller are, ah ….” Neeva trails off. “Hard to believe,” John confirms. (*Sings to John* “Doesn’t it hurt? / Jealousy, baby! / Doesn’t it burn? / Jealousy! / Doesn’t it consume your soul? …” *Cough* Sorry, I was watching Jem and the Holograms the other day ….) Neeva throws Rodney a look over her shoulder. “Yeah keep walkin’,” Rodney warns her. (*Snicker* Yet again, even with him hostile towards here, they’ve more chemistry. That’s gotta be weird, though, hating the woman wearing your girlfriend’s body — talk about being emotionally conflicted!)

Keller is collected from her cell for Neeva’s execution.

Sheppard’s team reaches the village. Neeva starts talking tactics, suggesting that only three of them go and that she be given a weapon. Sheppard says they’re not breaking in — a point that seems to surprise Carson (and maybe Ronon?) as much as Neeva. (Good for you, Sheppard, keeping a level head and avoiding violence when you can!) Sheppard says they’re going to try talking to the people; Neeva figures that the villagers aren’t likely to help, considering that she tried to rob them. Rodney rolls his eyes, reminding her that she’s in Keller’s body, so they won’t know her; Teyla adds that if Neeva keeps quiet, there shouldn’t be a problem. Neeva asks what if Keller was captured, pointing out that, when they sever the connection, she could be stuck in jail. (If Keller wasn’t captured in the act, who would the villagers have even known what Neeva looked like, then? Shouldn’t they automatically suspect that the Earthers had something to do with the thefts from that room in the first place, what with them wanting to see something that’s housed in that room?) Sheppard says it’s not their problem — they only agreed not to come after her themselves. Neeva says that she’s not going to help them disarm the device without knowing where her body is; McKay says testily that she doesn’t have a choice. Carson reminds them that they’re wasting time. Ronon suggests Neeva remain behind; she says no, she’ll go. Sheppard just says Ronon’s name, and the man instantly knows he’s now Neeva’s babysitter. (I love how seamlessly they work together! More team!!)

They walk into some village building, John introducing his team to the villagers there and Rodney explaining to the people what they’re looking for. A woman asks what they want with it, telling them that if they intend to take it, it’s now hidden and well-protected. Rodney explains that they only want to look at it, as the think it may have been accidentally activated and is now causing problems for them back home. John says that they just want to shut if off and go, Carson adding that they aren’t there to “cause trouble,” they “just need some assistance.” The village woman says that they need to talk to the magistrate, who isn’t there at the moment. Rodney’s none too pleased, and not any good at hiding the fact. The woman further explains that the man in question will return after an execution. Carson and Sheppard, from the looks on their faces, quickly realise just who it is that’s being executed.

We see Keller being pulled along, bound, to her execution, somewhere in the woods. He friends and Neeva race to her rescue. As she’s brought before the chopping block, she tries — and fails — again to make then understand that she’s not Neeva. (And yes, I actually do feel sorry for her.) Just when the executioner is about to drop the axe, he’s shot in the chest; Keller makes a break for it. (For s moment, I’m shocked that our guys would do that rather than try to reason with them. Then I realise it wasn’t our heroes what did it! Nice twist!) Her hands still bound behind her, Keller trips and falls. (Guess the running bound around in the woods with Kiryk wasn’t enough practice! *Snicker* Why is she always finding herself on the run in the woods, anyway? Is this some sort of fandom fetish I’m not aware of? For example, mine are “hurt/comfort”, redemption, and Spider-Man masks; are there people who enjoy women-being-chased-through-the-woods-while-in-deadly-peril? I suppose that it sort of falls under the slasher-film fandom, even though it’s not horror?)

Keller’s found by Neeva’s companions, one of which approaches with a knife; she tenses, thinking he means to use it on her, but he just cuts her loose. (I’m impressed: she doesn’t scream or beg or anything, No that I would have blamed her if she did, like she had done earlier, but bravo for the composure here!) “What? No thank-you for the rescue?” the man asks, amused, then walks off with his friend; she follows. Our heroes, meanwhile, stumble upon the execution site (without a map, no less), and discover, from a distance, that Keller has escaped. They hear the magistrate order that the ‘Gate be guarded and that none shall leave the planet until she’s recaptured. (Why don’t they just go up to him and explain their situation?)

As they walk through the woods, Rodney expresses his outrage, wondering how she escaped. (Uh, Rodney, considering that she was bout to be killed, shouldn’t you be on your knees in gratitude right now that she did??) Neeva suggests it was her accomplices, saying that it’s not the first time they’d been in such a situation. (Ah, I guess that’s where the loyalty comes in — if you want to be sure someone’s watching your back, you have to live up to your end of the bargain Although, even then, I can’t see how you could ever really trust the others to do the same for you ….) Carson asks how many she has; she answers two, suggesting that the men in question are more than capable, men not to be messed with. Ronon scoffs. Teyla asks where they would have gone; Neeva says she has no idea. (The way she says it, I doubt it’s true.) Sheppard orders “Chewie” to start tracking. (*Snicker* I sooo love that running gag!)

Neeva’s men lead Keller into a cave they’re using for shelter. The man who cut her free remarks that she looked frightened back there, asking if she didn’t believe they would save her. She starts to hedge, and they assures her that after all the times she’s saved them, they wouldn’t let her down. (Interesting; I don’t see the concept of “honour among thieves” depicted too often anymore …) The first man says she looks confused; she hedges again, saying she’s happy to be free. The second asks her what the plan is, and the first echoes it; of course she doesn’t know. The men exchange looks, and she clarifies that she just needs time to think. The first man warns her to think fast, figuring that the cave will be found sooner or later.

Sheppard’s team spot a group of villagers in the distance; Carson tells us that this is the third patrol they’ve seen in the past ten minutes. Teyla remarks that it seems like the whole village is out looking; Rodney says he hopes that they find her before the villagers do. Neeva bolts just then; Rodney is, shockingly, the first one to notice and react, nearly bowling Carson over in the process. The team pursues, but she’s gotten a good head start. Ronon, frustrated, admits that he’s lost her. Teyla asks if there’s a trail, and he says no, saying she’s good. (Seriously?? Man, she must be, if she could somehow keep from leaving a trail when running at breakneck speed! I mean, Kiryk couldn’t even elude Ronon, and he was a Runner!)

Keller, meanwhile, tries to convince her companions to leave the planet. The first man points out that the Ring of the Ancestors is guarded; she suggests a diversion. The second man asks what they could do for one; Keller suggests an explosion. (Heh, okay, evidence that she and Rodney are on the same wavelength after all — nice callback to “The Lost Tribe”!) The first man asks why the villagers would run towards the explosion. (I guess he and Daniel Jackson would make a good pair? *Snicker*) “Oooor … something else!” she replies with a hopeful note that they will come up with a plan where she can’t. The first man thinks they should wait till nightfall and launch a surprise attack on the Ring, killing the guards. The second man agrees, but of course Keller is decidedly unenthusiastic, starting to say that she might think of something else before then. The first man draws his gun, seemingly on her, quickly followed by the second man doing the same. As Keller raises her hands, the real Neeva walks in, hands raised, and it becomes apparent that they’re aiming at her. (Nice twist! Also, nice visual, having the two women, with their backs to us, frame the shot, both their hands raised as they look at each other while the men stand opposite them, guns drawn in opposing hands, somewhat like the screen is split in two and showing mirror images!)

The first man asks who Neeva is.; she tells them that, as well as what’s happened. The first man, Jannick, asks if she expects them to believe that. She says she does, and gives a quick example of another instance where she once expected the same of him, then does the same for the other man, Bordal, proving who she is. Keller then tells them that she had nothing to do with what’s happened; Neeva confirms it, adding that they need to fix the situation fast. (Why, Neeva? You could have a fresh start in Keller’s body, rack up a whole new list of chargers ….) She says they need to go destroy the device, warning that, besides the villagers, the people of Atlantis are also looking for them. Keller asks, smiling, who is there, “Colonel Sheppard?” (Ooh, that’s interesting! She doesn’t ask if Rodney’s there at all? She has more faith in Sheppard’s ability to find and protect her than Ronon? Hmmmm …. *Snicker*) Neeva confirms it but adds that the Earthers would catch them if they find them, warning Keller not to give her and her associates any problems.

Neeva then starts to give orders; Jannick tells her to stop, training his weapon on her again. He says he doesn’t know what’s going on, but he’s never seen Neeva (in Keller’s body) before. (Dude, the woman you thought was Neeva is not arguing with her, and was very indecisive, while Neeva-in-Keller is all take-charge, like you expect Neeva to be, and know sthings only Neeva would know. You seemed too smart before to be stumped by this now.) Neeva tells him that this isn’t the time to be stupid; Keller suggests that she might not want to antagonise him. Neeva tries to order him to put the gun down, but he refuses. He’s going to take them both to the Ring, attack the guards, and sort it out after they escape. (What happened to waiting for nightfall?) He warns that if she’s lying, she’s “as good as dead.” (It’s going to be awful hard to sort it out without that device — you wanna go back for it, dude? Keller, why not speak up? If the woman-who-should-be-Neeva-but-isn’t agrees with the woman-who-shouldn’t-be-Neeva-but-is, how can he deny that? None of his motivation here makes any sense to me ….)

As they walk through the woods, Neeva tells Keller that doctor can do better than McKay. Keller gives her a disgusted look (good for her!), and Bordal tells Neeva to shut up. Neeva tries to explain things to Jannick again, when bullets start hitting the trees around them. (For someone who’s supposed to be good at hiding her tracks, she’s been pretty darn careless just now, being so noisy!) A shootout ensues, and Bordal is killed. (Yay for Neeva, hurrying to his side when he falls! Keller does too — as I would expect. Interesting how the two women seem to be acting in tandem — a side effect of the device or simply a storytelling parallel?) Sheppard’s team, meanwhile, hear the gunfire and hurry towards it. (Well, I guess when it’s small explosions, people will go towards them?) Keller runs off. Jannick stands, intending to shoot her; Neeva pulls his arm down, so he doesn’t kill her body. As they struggle, Neeva is shot by the villagers. Jannick abandons her. (Odd, he saved Keller-as-Neeva, but despite the possibility that the woman who was just shot has Neeva in her brain, he’s not willing to save her anymore? For that matter, why he was so ready to kill her body? Why not just let her go? I guess maybe he’s just nuts?) A villager approaches Neeva with a rifle; she tries to crawl away. Ronon stuns the man. (See, there he goes saving “Keller” again — are we sure he shouldn’t have been her boyfriend instead? I mean, seeing as he seems a tad more capable of taking care of her, and she’s so often needing rescuing. Anyway, it’s too bad that she’s not in her own mind now, or maybe she would start thinking a little more kindly of the poor guy, knowing that he saved her arse ….) The team rushes in. Rodney asks if she’ll be okay; Carson says (after looking at her for about .0000001 of a second) that she will be, but he needs to stop the bleeding. (Oh, so you know already that no internal organs have been nicked? That no infection is setting in? Have you an Ancient scanner in your eye? Well, maybe he’s just wanting to reassure Rodney ….) Teyla, Ronon, and Sheppard keep their eye out for trouble, although Sheppard does pause to watch Carson, worried. (Awww. Flanigan and his fantastic facial expressions! And I can tell myself that he’s worried for how it would devastate Rodney If she dies. *Cough* …)

The team return to the building, where they asked about the device. Ronon (aka, the pack mule) carries Neeva in (still doing more for Keller than Rodney apparently can, and I wonder if Rodney is even thinking of that at all), while Carson, Teyla, and Rodney quickly clear a table. The village woman from before fills the magistrate in on who the newcomers are; in turn, he asks what happened to the woman that they’ve just brought in. Sheppard tells him that one of the villagers shot her. (Duh! What did the magistrate think happened when he’s got the forest teeming with armed men? That she’d shot herself?) The woman tells Sheppard that she warned him it wasn’t safe to be out at the time. (Uh, they left before anyone knew Keller-and-Neeva had escaped — why would it have been dangerous to be out then? Afraid the executioner might accidentally throw the axe at an innocent bystander? Or were they expecting Neeva to be rescued?) The magistrate asks if she’s dead. (Would they be scrambling around like mad if she was?) Carson says no, then barks some medical orders. McKay adds, commandingly, that they need access to the communication terminal, explaining about the link between Neeva and Keller. Sheppard steps in, asking if the man knows about Atlantis and saying that he’s better off being their friend than their enemy, so he’d better do as they ask. (The McShepper in me chooses to perceive this as John being a bully on Rodney’s behalf first and foremost, over Keller’s. *Grin*) After a moment’s hesitation, the magistrate agrees. (Despite his earlier illogical train of thought, I find I rather like the magistrate.)

We see Keller running. We see Rodney, John, and Ronon come to stand around the device. McKay announces that it’s still on, and informs us that it’s almost identical to the one at the SGC — with no switches. We see Carson remove the bullet from Neeva-as-Keller.

We see Keller-as-Neeva run across Jannick. He says that she’s definitely not Neeva; she confirms it, saying she’s not his enemy either, and she can help him if he lets her. He pulls a gun on her anyway, saying that she’s “not helping anyone.” (And what, precisely, is his motive for killing an unarmed woman who hasn’t done him any harm and who is stuck in the body of someone who is supposed to be his friend and who would probably like her body back? Especially since he apparently cared enough to save Neeva a few times in the past?)

John barks at Rodney to hurry up; Rodney says, rather patently, that he’s trying, but there’s no way to access the control crystals and shut it off. Sheppard asks if blowing it up would work; Rodney doesn’t know, saying maybe. Sheppard asks — while Ronon stands there looking impatient — what SG-1 did; Rodney explains that they tossed it into the vortex of a forming wormhole (the kawoosh!), but he figures that it’s too far for them to take the device back to the ‘Gate. (Why are you in such a hurry, when Keller’s body is severely hurt? You don’t know about the danger Keller-as-Neeva is in right now — wouldn’t it be better, from your standpoint, to keep her in the healthier body until you’re sure she’ll be all right? There should have been something added to the story like the notion that if they didn’t switch soon, there would come a point where they couldn’t or something ….)

Jannick says that Keller-as-Neeva got Bordal killed and almost got him killed too, so he’s going to return the favor. (How does he figure that? What did he ever do at her bequest? It’s not like she personally brought the village down on him! And if he wants her to die, wouldn’t it be better to do it when she’s in her own body? Okay, I guess I just have to accept that while he seemed reasonable and rational to start, he’s certifiable now …)

Sheppard decides that they don’t have any choice but to take the device to the ‘Gate, and moves to lift it; fretting that they might not have time, Rodney still moves to do the same. Ronon tells them to hold up. He draws his blaster and tells them to move; after they do, he shoots it.

We see Keller open her eyes — back in her own body. She looks around in confusion; we see she has an IV, but she’s still on the table in the village building. Teyla addresses her by name. (At first I assume that the device had been turned off a while ago, and she’s just now coming out of anaesthesia, but another scene makes me question that – in which case, how did Teyla know? Anyone coming out from under anaesthesia would be groggy and confused — I know from experience!) Carson tells her she’s back; she asks how, then gives an “Ow!” as he pokes at her wound. He informs her that she’s been shot but is going to be fine.

We see Neeva back in her own body, finding Jannick with his gun aimed at her. (This is why I figure Keller couldn’t have been in her own body but still under for a while. Unless, of course, this scene is a bit of a flashback, showing what happened maybe a half-hour past, before Keller woke up.) Neeva insists that it’s really her now, that the device has been turned off; he doesn’t believe her and cocks the gun. She tells him no — and we hear a gunshot as the scene changes to an image of Atlantis. (I know she’s supposed to be a murderer, but I feel sort of sorry for her. I guess I’m holding on to hope that the other murders were all leaning towards self-defense rather than cold-blooded killings. Mallozzi said that the story was originally going to be more final for her, rather than implied, but they decided to leave it a little more open for the possibility of her returning — and then the show got cancelled. I wouldn’t have minded seeing her again — although I would have preferred to see Kyrik again even more!)

Rodney bumps into Woolsey in the hall; Rodney is bearing flowers and chocolate for “a friend in the infirmary”. Woolsey says that’s very thoughtful. “I know,” Rodney says. (Oh gods, he sounds like he did back in season one, all aristocratic and aloof and full of himself. So much for Keller being good for him — he’s really regressed now! All for the sake of the upcoming gag ….) Woolsey informs us that they did a sweep of the planet and couldn’t find a sign of Neeva anywhere. (And how did they scan for her? Did they find a sample of her DNA somewhere, or round all the people on the planet up and then scan for lifesigns elsewhere? And why didn’t they find Jannick? How did he get past the Ring’s guards?) Woolsey figures she escaped; Rodney tells him about how Keller said her accomplice was about to kill her when they switched bodies. Woolsey says then that either Jannick killed her and hid the body, or she escaped. Rodney figures that they’ll never know; Woolsey reveals that the Coalition is looking for her, so if she’s free, “she won’t be for long.” Woolsey turns off in another direction; Rodney stands thoughtful a moment, giving a curious “huhn”, and moves on.

We see Carson telling a bed-ridden Keller to take it easy; Rodney arrives, saying he’ll make sure of it. He and Keller give each other a cute little hello. Carson teasingly thanks Rodney for the chocolate and flowers. Rodney says he just figured he’d “brighten the room up a bit.” Someone clears his throat;; Carson moves, revealing Radek on the bed behind him. Rodney gives a polite but not-very-sincere hello, asking how the man is doing. Radek says sourly that he’s doing better. Keller apoligises, apparently not for the first time. (Why? It’s not like she stabbed him, even if it was her body! Unless she means for touching the stones, making it possible for Neeva to get there?) He tells her kindly that it wasn’t her fault and not to worry about it. Rodney flippantly says of course Radek is fine — and suggests that the man is ready to go back to work. Radek says he doesn’t know about that; Carson chidingly says to Rodney that Radek needs rest. Keller agrees, saying Radek’s wound was more serious than hers. “Really? I mean, you were shot. He was just … stabbed,” Rodney says, again flippant, with a shrug of his shoulders. (Up until that last part, I could buy it as him being secretly relieved that Radek was going to be okay, mixed with their typical rivalry, but that came off as really insensitive, even for him, at least for nowadays as opposed to first season! More character regression, all for a laugh! Argh!)

Carson suggests to Radek that he could wheel him into the other room. “Just until he’s gone, thank you,” Radek replies. Rodney looks unapologetic as Carson excuses himself and wheels Radek away, with Radek muttering in Czech as they go. (Some have suggested that Rodney did it all on purpose, so he could be alone with Keller, and I can certainly believe that, given the context. Which makes the scene all the worse for me. His being gaga for Keller means he’s willing to treat another friend so poorly? You know what would have been a much better ending, to me? If it turned out that, while the flowers were for Keller, the chocolates were actually for Radek. And he’d get points in Keller’s eyes for being so sweet, too! It would have been funny and it would have been good character growth! Plus it would have been a nice bone to the McRadek shippers. Also, regarding the gifts, if he came up on the idea on his own, great, but I hope he didn’t just do it because it seems the thing to do, you know?)

Keller has a big grin on her face when she turns back to Rodney from watching Radek leve. (Now here’s an instance where I wouldn’t really have blamed her for chiding Rodney, and instead she seems pleased! So much for her guilt, ey? Well, I can’t be too mad at her; after all she’s been through; I can’t blame her for wanting some alone-time with her guy.) She thanks Rodney for the gifts. Rodney suggests that, when she’s feeling better, they could go for a ride in a ‘jumper to the mainland to have a picnic and maybe lay out under the stars. She blinks at him, and asks if he did indeed turn off the communication terminal, teasingly asking if there’s not someone else in his head. He assures her that it is. She starts to point out that his idea — is so not him, he finishes, a bit dejected. He apologises, saying that it was a bad idea. (See, now why’d you even bring it up, Keller? You keep trying to shape him into a nicer person anyway, so what difference does it make to you if you gave him the idea or someone elsedoes, so long as he decides to act on it? Without prompting to do so, no less! Of course, I can look at this as an instance of her being an imperfect girlfriend, as I mentioned earlir, which actually makes me like her a smidge better, in one way: at least it puts her and Rodney on more even footing, having her be insensitive to him.) She hurriedly tells him no, no, she thinks it’s a great idea, and takes his hand. (I’m very happy that she seems to recognise that she screwed up and atones for it. In fact, I’d even say this bit is sweet. If there wasn’t such a history of my being aggravated with her, and if it hadn’t just come on the coattails of Rodney being a jerk to Radek, if I had seen this moment out of context, I might even have liked the notion of them being together after this bit. But alas, there are too many flies in this sugar. And the picture of him doing all that with Neeva is still somehow more appealing. *Snicker*)

See you next week, for my review of “Vegas” — I’m crossing my fingers that it will be a deliciously McSheppy (and mostly McKeller-free) episode! Oh, and don’t forget my “Goodbye to the ‘Gate Party”, January 9th at 11:10 EST, at “The ‘Gate Room”, my virtual chatroom!

In the meantime, if you get bored, you can check out the slashy (but clean!) retelling of “A Christmas Carol” that I wrote over the holidays, “A Conspiracy of Spirits”, which tells the tale from Jacob Marley’s point of view. It’s a sequel to another retelling I did a few years ago, of “The Nutcracker and the Mouseking”, called “Nussknacker”, and features three characters from that one (it’s not absolutely necessary to read that story as well, but I think it would help). These stories are set in my New Avalon storyverse. Shameless plug.

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Wolfen Moondaughter is on the editorial board for the comics industry webzine Sequential Tart, for which she has written since late 2001. She’s an artist, too, having done spot illustrations for Dragonlance, among other things. In her spare time, she’s a rabid fanficcer/fanartist. See more of her work at her site, Wolfen’s Webworld.