“I don’t know about you, Miss Kitty, but I feel so much…yummier.” - Catwoman

By Teresa Jusino

I sit here in mourning. This has been the first Sunday in weeks that my housemates and I haven’t been able to get together to watch the one television show that everyone in the house loves.  This Thanksgiving weekend, as each of us went to different destinations to spend the holiday, I’m sure of one thing.  Somewhere, in our deepest heart of hearts, we were all giving thanks for True Blood.

It’s difficult to write reviews of shows you like.  Picking apart crap is easy, and there never seems to be a shortage of synonyms for “bad.”  It’s also more fun to tear apart a bad television show, and it almost feels like you’re providing a public service as you warn people away from a horrible experience that would tarnish their otherwise happy lives.  However, I had to take a break from writing reviews for a couple of weeks, because how many different ways can one say awesome?  Season One of True Blood set the show going with a bang, and I can’t wait until Summer 2009 when the show is scheduled to return.

For those of you who miss my scintillating recaps, here is how our favorite characters on television ended up this season.  **SPOILER ALERT** (don’t say I didn’t warn you):

**Arlene and René prepare for their upcoming nuptials, and Arlene is practically oblivious to the goings-on in Bon Temps as she plans her wedding reception…that is, until she finds a Cajun accent tape among René’s things…

**Eddie the Vampire tells Jason his vampire-turning story which comes right on the heels of his coming-out story.  Feeling empathetic, Jason begins sneaking Eddie Tru-Blood to make him more comfortable.  The camaraderie is cut short when Amy kills Eddie, expecting Jason to help her clean the mess.  Jason and Amy go from hot to cold and break up, only to get back together again just in time for the Bon Temps killer to strangle Amy.  Upon discovering her dead body, Jason calls the police.  Despite having no memory of doing so, Jason confesses to her murder, turning himself in for a crime he didn’t commit on the assumption that he must be somehow responsible as the women he sleeps with all end up dead.  As he is held in jail, he is visited by a representative from the Fellowship of the Sun, who tells him that he is a servant “doing God’s work” by killing vampires and those who consort with them.

**After much hemming and hawing, and a generous loan from Sam, Tara gets an 0 exorcism from Miss Jeanette, the woman who exorcised her mother.  The effects are astonishing, and Tara is happier than she’s ever been…until she discovers that Miss Jeanette is a fake who actually works at the local pharmacy in disguise.  Miss Jeanette makes the point that despite having used peyote to induce Tara’s hallucination, the “exorcism” was still effective and worth the money, pointing out that Tara’s mother was still sober.  Tara leaves angry, and later becomes so angry that she drives drunk and crashes her car, getting arrested.  Her mother comes to visit her in jail only to let her know that she can’t come home.  It’s Lettie Mae’s version of “tough love”, only Tara points out her hypocrisy after having spent a life rescuing her mother from situations much worse than this.  Just as she felt she had nowhere to turn, a mysterious woman named Maryann arrives to bail her out of jail, give her a beautiful place to stay, and give her a more positive outlook on life.  But Maryann and Sam appear to know each other, and there’s the suggestion that Maryann is not as altruistic as she seems.

**Bill is put on trial by his fellow vampires for the death of Longshadow.  Despite Eric’s defense, the vampire Magister decides to not only punish Bill, but be creative about it.  He has plucked an innocent, zealously Christian girl named Jessica from town, and he forces Bill to turn her into a vampire, making Bill a Maker for the first time.  Bill feels for the girl and isn’t happy doing it.  His pity for her quickly evaporates, however, as she becomes the most annoying new vampire in the world.  Bill pawns her off on Eric, saying that if he takes Jessica off his hands, he’ll owe Eric a favor.  Eric complies, only to return her days later saying, “There are favors, and then there are favors.”

**Sam reveals that he is a shapeshifter.  Well, he sort of has to, as he ends up naked at the foot of Sookie’s bed with no explanation after having fallen asleep there the night before as a dog.  Sookie relates to his being an outsider, after an initial freak-out, and the knowledge of his “condition” brings them closer.

**Lafayette is concerned by the disappearance of his V supplier and friend.  He attacks Jason, blaming his lack of discretion for Eddie’s disappearance, but never knowing that Jason kidnapped Eddie himself.  He also catches “Duke”, his senator client, on television making a speech that is both vamp-phobic and homophobic.  He makes a visit to the senator, sternly warns him against hypocrisy, and poses with him for a gloriously passive-aggressive photo op.

**After suffering yet another death at the hands of the Bon Temps serial killer (her cat is found decapitated and strung up to her kitchen ceiling fan), being attacked by him herself at Merlotte’s, having her vampire boyfriend go away for who-knows-how-long, and having her brother locked in jail for a crime she knows he didn’t commit, Sookie becomes fiercely determined to find the serial killer that’s been terrorizing her and the other women in town.  She enlists Sam’s help, and their search takes them to a nearby town, where a murder has taken place that Sookie saw in the killer’s mind.  She discovers a lead, a man named Drew Marshall who had killed his sister there.  Sookie and Sam ask the local sheriff to send the Bon Temps police a picture of Drew Marshall, and he does.  The picture, however, gets lost in the paper shuffle and no one sees that it’s a picture of René!

In the end, Sookie is chased by an angry René, who is revealed as the killer, and is apparently made angry by anyone who has sexual relations with a vampire.  As he chases her and violently beats her in the graveyard, Bill senses she is in danger and rushes to her aid - in the daylight!  He forces himself toward her, but collapses in a burning heap.  Sam transforms into a dog and attacks René, buying her the time she needs to grab a shovel and pummel René with it, killing him.

Sam brings Sookie home, and she recuperates, grateful to Sam for having saved her.  Bill, having been buried to protect him from further sun damage, lives and is reunited with Sookie after having fed - though whom he’s fed from is vague.  Lafayette is attacked by a mysterious force and goes missing.  Jason is released from jail and begins following the Fellowship of the Sun.  Tara continues her quest for self-improvement with the suspiciously generous Maryann.  Arlene begins to see Terry, the Iraq veteran, in a new light.  And Andy is upset by having fumbled the serial killer case so completely.  Good thing there’s a dead body in his car!  Now he has a whole new mystery to solve!

There were so many great things about True Blood this season.  I love how vampires die on this show, for instance.  They sort of explode like a popped blood balloon when staked, making the “dusting” effect on Buffy, The Vampire Slayer look downright wussy.  Speaking of Buffy, though, new vampire Jessica seems to be visiting from a Joss Whedon set, and I love that, too.  Best line?  You’re the worst maker EVER! I’m looking forward to more of her.  I’ve gone from being annoyed by Sam, to really enjoying him as a character, now that I know what he’s been dealing with.  I’ll be curious to see how he and Sookie bond next season.  Especially now that they’ve kissed.  Lafayette is not only hot, but he is an amazing character - feminine and sassy one minute, furious and intensely masculine the next.  Watching him defend not only himself, but the rights of gays (and vampires), is a pleasure.  Jason has also evolved in a wonderful way.  Far from being just the pretty-boy screw-up, I’m looking forward to watching him do battle with his conscience as he cozies up to the Fellowship.

AND BILL PLAYS Wii GOLF! I’m sorry, but how wonderfully geeky is THAT?!

This isn’t to say that the season was without flaws.  Toward the end, the writing of Sookie’s character was a little shaky.  One could blame her erratic mood swings on what she’s been through, but her sudden hostile attitude toward Bill didn’t make any sense to me.  He is put on trial after having killed one of his own to defend her, and she gets pissy because he’s “abandoned” her?  It seemed very out of character, and without good reason.  It’s also a shame that Amy had to die.  She was an interesting character that exuded an aura of shadiness even as she got everyone to like her.  I was expecting her to become more important.  I only hope that they work her into flashbacks or something.

However, despite the slight mishandling of these two strong female characters, True Blood is still one of the most colorful, creative, well-acted, and well-written shows on television.  I can’t wait for Season Two!

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TERESA JUSINO was born on the same day that Skylab fell. Coincidence? She doesn’t think so.  As a writer, her work has appeared in Elmont Life newspaper, and on the sadly defunct website, CentralBooking.com. She is currently at work on a collection of short stories. As a geek, Teresa loves Star Trek, Lost, comics, and anything Joss Whedon ever touched. She has a fangirl *squee-ing* crush on Brian K. Vaughan, which beat up her Robert Downey Jr as Iron Man crush in a fight proving once again that writing skill trumps gadget skill even when that gadget skill is attached to bulging biceps.  Teresa is also an aspiring fangbanger.  Visit her in The Red Room.