By Lisa Fary
With Bruce Campbell, mutant cannibals and virtual reality, why isn’t Mindwarp a cult classic?
Certainly not because it sucks – plenty of movies that are less than brilliant are cult classics. Take, for instance, They Live. By no means is it a brilliant movie, but They Live is awesome. There’s also The Toxic Avenger, Repo Man, or Near Dark, just to name a few.
I found Mindwarp on FearNet On Demand. All I needed were the words “Bruce Campbell” and “post-apocalyptic future” to get my hopes up for a culty good time. Maybe I’d unearthed a mostly forgotten masterpiece!
The premise is promising enough. Humanity – predictably – blew itself up and those who are left reside at Infinisynth, a facility where people wear white footie pajamas and spend all their time hooked in to the Infinisynth virtual reality system. Rebellious Judy longs for real things, real experiences and winds up trekking through the real world with Bruce Campbell, who for some reason has a fur covered crossbow, fighting off mutant cannibals and getting some post-apocalyptic nookie.
Mindwarp was no forgotten masterpiece, but why isn’t it a cult classic? This is why:
1. It takes itself way too seriously. When your actors are this lousy, the only way to save it is to work with what you’ve got and go camp. Mindwarp doesn’t – it’s just keeps plodding along searching for that Road Warrior vibe until it gives up and overcompensates with gore.
2. It crosses the line. I’m not squeamish. Blood and gore don’t bother me. What does bother me is a father attempting to breed with his own daughter. What does bother me is seeing a little girl tortured and hacked to pieces. That’s not horror, that’s poor taste.
3. Mindwarp decides to rip-off The Wizard of Oz and isn’t even subtle about it. In the end, it’s all been a virtual reality dream provided by Infinisynth. Judy even says, “There’s no place like home.”
4. Bruce Campbell is wasted. True, this was an early addition to the Campbell library, but it’s still post-Evil Dead II. His role as the post-apocalyptic dreamboat, Stover, requires him to play it too straight. He’s bland. He isn’t given much to do other than bone Judy and kill a mutant cannibal with an excavated food processor blade. It’s not until the last ten minutes, when Stover goes batsh!t crazy, that the Bruce Campbell we love emerges.
There are no redeeming qualities to Mindwarp, not even Bruce Campbell in his early thirties without a shirt. However, Mindwarp will make you forget – or long for – Bruce Campbell’s powers of awesome. So, if you’re feeling a little Bruce Campbelled out, if you’re feeling that your relationship with the Evil Dead series has gone a bit stale, watch Mindwarp. It’ll wipe those memories away, paving the way for a fresh Bruce Campell experience. Kinda like pickled ginger in a sushi dinner.
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Lisa Fary’s early exposure to classic Battlestar Galactica in 1979 is largely responsible for her lifelong interest in science fiction and her childhood ambition of being an intergalactic space cowgirl. She thinks diagramming sentences is a fun alternative to Sudoku.
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Lisa Fary's earliest influences are Princess Leia, Rainbow Bright, Astronaut Barbie, and her 6th grade teacher, Ms. Palmer. She's angry that it's 2011 and she still doesn't have a hovercraft, but will accept a jetpack as consolation. That jetpack had better be pink with a rhinestone monogram. 
Ah yes, Mindwarp, if you haven't yet seen Mooncrap…ahem, MoonTRAP, the only redeeming part about the film is Bruce who doesn't last the duration of the film, and so you can share yourself the soft core scene Walter Koening is in after Bruce's demise…"don't that sh*t from the machine!"
I absolutely love cheap, questionably good movies. I have shelves of 'em. So I need to see this right effing NOW.
How are you liking the FearNet OnDemand? I watched Midnight Meat Train on there and I thought that was pretty good.
No. Those are the deadlands.
What is good about Mindwarp though is it fits into Bruce's theory that B Movies are the proving ground for A Movie ideas because isn't this just the Matrix? That said I do agree with the reviewer, with Bruce and The Tall Man himself Angus Scrimm, produced by Fangoria Magazine no less, this should've been 10 times better than it was.