“I would never take advantage of a sexually immature species.” - Lt. Ilia

By Wolfen Moondaughter

So Mallozzi’s last episode, while not as shining or explosive as “Broken Ties”, let him go out of the season with a fairly good bang! It feels good that I’ve been able to, thanks to the writers and Picardo’s talent, around so thoroughly on Woolsey’s character, that I enjoyed the use of him here — thanks, guys, for proving my fears unwarranted. (Now if only you could do that with McKeller — I really would like to enjoy her characters again). I was happy to see Kolya again, too (Interesting, the last appearance for their other major villain right after the last appearance of their other major individual bad guy, Michael ….) There were lots of great little Sixth Sense-y sort of twists here as well (something I’ve come to expect from Mallozzi) — every time I thought I knew what was going on, some new little clue would throw me off again! Lots of great angst for both Woolsey and Sheppard, and some great Sheppard-whump — both physical and emotional. Too bad there was no one there to witness said whummpage, though, as, for me, that’s the best part of a character getting whumped: the sympathy from others. Well, I guess there’s sympathy from the AI, so that’s something. I do lament that it wasn’t a team ep (really, I always will lament episodes that aren’t), but at least we had those beautiful team moments at the beginning and end of the episode — especially the end, since Sheppard was there that time. (By the by, Mallozzi offers some interesting insights to the ep in his blog .…)

5.15: “Remnants”

Our story begins with Teyla, Rodney, and Ronon having lunch. Watching Woolsey gather his breakfast, Teyla remarks on how lonely and cut-off the man seems, and how he never seems to sit and eat with anyone. Rodney scoffs, insisting some people are just busy (doubtless an excuse he has given himself over the years when he probably used to eat alone). Ronon says that he sometimes heard Woolsey crying at night; (adorkably) gullible Rodney is shocked, then annoyed when Ronon reveals that he’s kidding. As Woolsey walks by, Teyla invites him to sit with them; Woolsey begs off, saying he’s eating in his quarters while he prepares for his pending evaluation, which has him nervous. Teyla seems surprised at his nervousness, telling him frankly that he’s done wonderfully and has nothing to worry about. Woolsey hopes the IOA agrees, and leaves. McKay remarks flippantly that this proves he’s right, Woolsey prefers to be alone; he then wonders where Sheppard is. (*Snicker* Funny that Rodney thinking about being alone would segue to wondering where John is; lonely, Rodney? *Wink*) Teyla reveals knowingly that Sheppard “flew some astrobiologists to the mainland,” Ronon elaborating that the man had agreed to stay with them overnight. Rodney, perplexed, asks why he would do that. Ronon gives a little head-toss and smile that says McKay should know it has to do with a girl, and then gives the you know look when McKay doesn’t get it. (Was it just me, or did Rodney seem a bit disappointed/upset at Sheppard’s absence, specially when he learned it would be overnight? *Evil grin*)

On the mainland, Sheppard listens with feigned interest to a female astrobiologist. (Now there’s a new term …. And crickey, John, when did you get so shallow? Why would you want to spend time with the woman at all when you clearly have no interest in her career, which is apparently the whole of her life?) Someone calls out, “Oh my god!”, and Sheppard goes running. Turns out there’s no emergency; it’s just Parrish (who is a botanist, last I checked, but I guess if you’re studying alien plantlife you fall under the heading “astrobiologist” — or else Teyla didn’t want to remind Rodney of Katie with the “b” word …) The man is excited over a discovery. “Lorne warned me about this,” John says to himself, disgusted. (*Snicker*) As Parrish gushes about his find, John says he’s going to the ‘jumper to set up for the night, asking the lady scientist if she wants to join him. Giving him an And miss this?? look, she moves past him to talk to Parrish. (Haaaah! Poor John, losing the girl to the geek. *Snicker* Way to go, Parrish! Although maybe the Lorne/Parrish shippers are heartbroken now …. By the by, I think it’s interesting to note that the man playing Parrish was also on Sanctuary, the show right after this, the night this ep aired …) Moving away, John sarcastically says that’s what they’re here for — all night. (Serves him right!) Sheppard hears a sound (a Who, maybe? *grin*), and moves to investigate. Then he hears another, behind him; he turns, only to get zapped by a stunner. (If I wasn’t already spoiled, I would have thought Wraith.) Sheppard wakes up a bit later, left where he’d fallen, hands tied behind his back and no one about. He drags himself to a sharp rock and scrapes the rope against it.

Back in Atlantis, Woolsey struggles to juggle his breakfast stuffs and operate the transporter, when a lovely woman offers her assistance. (At first I wonder if she’s the IOA rep, but then it occurs to me that such a person would not be wearing an Atlantis uniform. Her flag patch is strange — it has a Union Jack in the corner, and a constellation on a field of blue. I can’t find it in the flag database I looked at, though I found plenty that were similar. Anyone know what it represents?) He tells her that he’s going to the Southeast Pier, level 19. “Ooh, the penthouse suit,” she says with a grin. (So, looks like they’re pretty spread out across the city now. I would think, given the way the shields work and how much power they drain, that they would want to keep people close to the tower, just in case they need to fly into space while damaged again ….) He asks her if they’ve met before; she introduces herself as Dr Vanessa Conrad, saying that she’s recently arrived on the Apollo. (Oh! You know, I’d been wondering if they were keeping that ship in Milky Way for some reason — we always see the Daedalus instead. Not that I mind — I much prefer Caldwell to Ellis, mostly because I adore Pileggi.) Conrad remarks that it’s going to take her weeks to find her way around the big, beautiful city; Woolsey is still awkward as he tries to assure her that they will help her at orientation. (I imagine he was going to offer to help her find her way himself but chickened out.) Smiling, she bashfully apologises for keeping him and starts to activate the transporter; he starts to protest he’s not in a hurry, but then they arrive at his hallway. He bids her farewell as he reluctantly exits; she tells him he can call her Vanessa. He agrees with a smile and starts to reply what she can call him, but the door closes just before he can say that she can call him “Dick”. (Kudos to Picardo, who apparently ad-libbed that. *Snicker*)

John frees himself, then pats himself down, finding himself stripped of his gun and C-4. The ‘jumper proves similarly empty.

Radek walks into Rodney’s lab. McKay asks what Zelenka is doing back early from a dinner that was apparently in the Czech’s honour; Radek reveals that the team with him, Lt Donovan’s, had an allergic reaction to some berry, which Radek wonders if he might be reacting to as well. (I think how lucky it was Mr Allergies McKay wasn’t there, and a little bell goes off in my head, but for the time being, I don’t get what it means.) “Yeah, FYI, this conversation ended six seconds ago,” Rodney informs Radek, turning back to his work. Ignoring him, Radek says that he got an idea on the way back. “Well, have a little lie-down, it’ll pass,” Rodney tells him, eyes on his screen. (*Snicker*) Radek is insistent: he’s noticed temperature variations in the ocean around them and wants to scan the ocean floor. He argues that they spend more time exploring offworld than the planet they’re on (nicely echoing our situation on Earth, where we know more about space than our oceans). Rodney isn’t convinced that there’s anything there to be found, feeling such a search to be a “giant waste of time.” (I love their little interactions — even if, by the end, this one doesn’t technically count. At the same time, I do wish that Rodney could be a little nicer to Radek, after all these years. But from a storytelling standpoint, I guess that wouldn’t really be prudent — the fact that McKay is so hostile makes the poignant moments even more so, and the other moments funnier. If they got along, there wouldn’t be much use to Radek and the story would be bland, I suppose ….)

John pulls out a knife (they left him that??) and fiddles with the fuse box in the ‘jumper, which is sparking. Giving up, he heads outside and spots a singed area on the ground. He moves on.

Woolsey practices his welcome speech as he waits for the IOA rep to show, pacing as he speaks, ignoring the people around him. Shen Xiaoyi arrives, beamed in. (You may recognise her from a Mallozzi/Mullie-credited SG-1 ep “The Scourge”, where she and Daniel spoke together in her native Mandarin, saying something disparaging about Mitchell in the language, only for Mitchell to reply “Screw you!” to Daniel, in Mandarin. One of the funniest moments in the franchise ever.) Woolsey offers her greeting, stumbling over the words despite his grandiose rehearsals. She returns his greeting warmly. (And so, for a moment, I wonder if she’s perhaps become a little nicer. Then again, politeness seems to go hand-in-hand with IOA members ….)

John returns to where the scientists had been set up, and finds it trashed, the scientists gone.

Woolsey shows Shen the control room. Sounding as fake as any IOA member, he asks Amelia how her kickboxing is going, then says hi to Chuck — only thing is, he calls him “Chet”. When Chuck corrects him, Woolsey begs off, saying that “Chet’s on the late shift.” As he walks away, Chuck mutters (as I expected) that there is no “Chet”. (*Snicker*)

Radek follows Rodney through the halls, still trying to convince Rodney to do the scans he wants to do. Interrupting him and making talking motion with his hand, Rodney says, irritably, “You know, I can see your lips moving but I’m not hearing any sound ….” Radek pushes. Rodney stops, and points out that Radek could just do it if he thinks it’s so important. Radek says that he requires Rodney’s authorisation. Rolling his eyes, Rodney gives it; thanking him, Radek starts to hurry off. (It strikes me as a little odd that Radek needs permission, figuring that, as second in command of the science division, he would have a certain leeway for something that didn’t really require any resource but time and maybe a tiiiiiiny bit of power, but I shrug it off for now, figuring it’s some silly IOA regulation.) Rodney calls out to him, stalling him, saying that it’s unlikely that he’s going to find anything. Radek figures that if he’s wrong, then he’ll simply have wasted an hour and Rodney will be free to say “I told you so.” Rodney makes a hmmm, I hadn’t thought of that, but you’re right sort of sound, nodding. Radek adds that, if he’s right, perhaps they’ll name something after him (Radek) for a change. He leaves, and, after a pause of thought, Rodney follows, calling out again. (Ooooh, that’s sneaky — more on what I mean by this later ….)

Also walking through the halls, Woolsey tells Shen about what a tough act to follow Carter and Weir were; Shen says he’s done well, surviving the nine months so far. He says he’d like to think he’s done more than that, and starts to say that he hopes she’ll see as much as she reviews his report. She says it won’t be necessary, confirming that he’s passed — and adding that he’s being brought home and being made head some new Environmental Initiative for Earth. (A nice parallel to when Sam was taken out, with the hint that she was needed back home for bigger and better things; to both Sam and now Woolsey, being taken form Atlantis is seen as a demotion, no matter what pretty words are used, and really? They’re not quite wrong.)

In the control room, Rodney has, of course, taken Radek’s project over. He goes into a lengthy little speech about how, now that the scans been initiated, he’s got thirty minutes for a snack and will be back in time to confirm that the scan found nothing. Amelia speaks up just then, saying they’ve found something. (Haaaa, brilliant!) “Yes, of course we did,” Rodney says, perplexed. (As if that would negate what he’d just said. *Snicker*) Amelia tells them that the thing they’ve found is 1500 feet below sea level. Rodney continues to look confused, and a tad contrite— or maybe unsettled — while Radek looks a tad smug.

John continues following strange sounds in the woods, and eventually spots what looks to be a Genii. The man’s back is to him. He sneaks up on the fellow, only for him to be, inexplicably, not there a moment later. (I had already suspected, thanks to the preview last week, that what John is seeing is a dream or delusion; it’s at this point that I first make the assumption that the thing the scan found on the ocean floor has something to do with it.) And then suddenly Kolya is behind him, with a stunner aimed at him. John is, of course, shocked and uneasy. He hears a sound behind him; he turns just in time to get hit in the face by the Genii he’d been stalking.

In Woolsey’s quarters, Shen confesses to not understanding Woolsey’s reaction, pointing out that the man had dreaded coming in the first place. Woolsey says that things change; he likes it here and he doesn’t like leaving work unfinished. (I’m curious as to what needs finishing yet. Does he mean to stay till the Wraith are gone? Does he expect the entire expedition to leave Pegasus after that?) He suspects that the IOA is up to something and calls her on it. She confesses that he hasn’t been as complacent as they would like, doing things against protocol and making decisions against common sense, and they felt it time for a change. (Funny thing is, if they did replace him, and the replacement didn’t come to realise how those sorts of decisions were necessary as he came to, then the survival rate of the expedition would, I think, drop considerably. I think Woolsey realised that the decisions Weir and Carter made before him were largely unavoidable …)

A lackey wheels a strange device into Rodney’s lab, where he and Radek are waiting. Radek wonders loud how long it had been underwater, adding, “To think it would have remained undiscovered, if we hadn’t have …” Looking at Rodney, he trails off, and instead contritely compliments the man’s work on boosting the long-range sensors. Rodney thanks him insincerely, telling the man reluctantly, “Nice work on the … wild guess.” Radek thanks him and suggests that they get to work.

On the mainland, Kolya speaks into a radio, telling his men that scientists don’t run very fast, so they should keep looking. (Working with my theory, I find myself wondering if the scientists are having their own delusions. If I hadn’t know it was a delusion, I would have wondered how in the world they’d managed to escape.) Kolya then notices that John, who is tied up again, feet too, is now awake. John says that he killed Kolya; Kolya corrects him, saying that John shot him. John insists that Beckett confirmed he was dead; Kolya says something vague about having used an ancient device. (And if I didn’t already know he was real, would have been suspicious of the fact that he doesn’t explain the device — it seems far too convenient, and Mallozzi is a better storyteller than that. But of course, since it isn’t actually Kolya, there’s no actual explanation for the delusion to give …) Sheppard asks how the man found them, much less got there; Kolya says that some of the expedition’s offworld contacts aren’t so trustworthy. (He couldn’t have used the ‘Gate, since it’s in the city, and half a day would hardly be enough time to take the city over when it’s still full of people, not to mention how would he get to the mainland? And the only ones with spaceships that could have gotten them there would be the Travelers, unless the man is calling the Asgard allies to the Earthers. And then there’s the matter of, if the Travelers did bring them to the planet, how would they have escaped the notice of the city’s scanners? How could the Travelers have searched for Sheppard with their own sensors, or sent down a shuttle with Kolya’s team, without Atlantis asking what they were doing? But of course, since I know it’s a delusion, these points are moot; still, John has to be totally stumped, poor guy. You’d think the lack of sense would tip him off that this is all a dream, but then, dreams often seem logical to the dreamer while they are still dreaming ….) Kolya talks about how long it would take to get to Atlantis from there, figuring a day and a half for walking to the shore, and then two days by boat. Sheppard points out that Atlantis would blow them out of the water before then. Kolya says they’d be “too busy counting their dead,” explaining that they intend to send an explosive through the ‘Gate — but first they need Sheppard’s IDC. When Sheppard tells him to go to hell, Kolya, unfazed, remarks that he thought Sheppard might react like that, and slugs him.

Conrad pays Woolsey a visit, asking him if he’d like to catch a movie, telling him about a couple of comedies that are playing. He explains that he’s not really in the mood. She suggests, teasingly, they try the next day, then, listing two other comedies (with the insinuation being that they aren’t actually funny, and therefore perfect for his mood.) He smiles faintly. She asks if he’d like to talk about what’s troubling him; he tells her about his removal from his command, explaining that it seems he’s lost the position because he “wouldn’t just roll over for them”. (Hmm. Is it really a “command” position if you’re a civilian? I would have thought “Head of Atlantis” or “Head of the Expedition” or “Leader” to be more appropriate. Well, it’s just semantics, I suppose; I’m just curious …) She tells him not to roll over then; he says it’s too late, the decision’s been made. She asks why they would send someone on a three week journey to tell him such rather than just sending a message. (Actually, I would think that they were hoping he would be pleased with his new appointment and hoping to remove him without a fuss. Such is not the case, but I could easily believe it.) The look on his face says the thought hadn’t occurred to him, but now that she raises it, he realises that something’s rotten in Denmark.

Woolsey meets Shen in the cafeteria. He sits, sans food, and asks if she really expected him to give up without a fight. (Well, until Conrad talked to you, you were.) She concedes that she did, saying that she thought he would follow common sense. Woolsey reminds her that she was sent to evaluate him, not fire him; he says the IOA hasn’t decided yet, but she apparently has. He figures out that someone within the IOA wants him gone and is using her to meet their ends; he asks what she’s getting out of it. She doesn’t answer, looking a bit panicked, but he figures it out: she’s been promised his job. She regains her composure and tells him that it “will all go easier” if he just accepts it, pointing out that she’s been the one put into the position of deciding his fate, so he can’t win. (Yow! Too bad Woolsey doesn’t have a camera with a microphone handy — he could film her and prove that she’s not unbiased! Bravo to him, though — I like it when he’s sussing things out, like he did at the trial in “Inquisition”, using logic!)

Kolya finishes up a round of hitting Sheppard and remarks that John can tolerate more than any man he’s ever known; Sheppard replies that he was married once. (*Snicker*) Kolya muses that John is there to protect people, but can’t manage it half the time, suggesting John’s failures are what drives him. (Ooh, nice character study! Quick but spot-on!) He hits John again, asking the man if he thinks not giving Kolya the IDC is keeping the people safe, arguing that he’s just delaying the inevitable. He says that Sheppard can’t protect anyone, that he’s lost and the people in the city are as good as dead. (And so John should what? Just get it over with and hand the IDC over? Kolya’s not exactly making his own case very effectively …) Seeing that the threat hasn’t helped, Kolya radios, asking for two men to come back, promising Sheppard that he’s going to wish he’d given them the IDC.

Radek strides into Rodney’s lab, asking what the man is doing. (Okay, I can see having this happen in order for Rodney to tell us what he’s doing, but it seems odd for Radek to have left Rodney working on the project alone after all the effort he put into getting it ….) Rodney is concerned about radiation the device is putting off, although he confesses that it’s not dangerous. Radek suggests firmly that they should concentrate on the data, then. Rodney insists that he has been, with no success in cracking the code. Radek assures him that he will think of something; thrown, Rodney asks what makes him so sure. Radek says, bluntly, that Rodney is brilliant. Rodney agrees, but starts to add that this doesn’t mean he’s going to crack it, when he does a double take at the compliment. (I do, too, although really, Radek has been known to compliment Rodney now and then, so I then dismiss the warning bells in my head and instead enjoy the warm-fuzzy moment.) Rodney asks why Radek said that — is Radek sick? “Am I sick?” he asks, eyes wide with panic, asking what Radek has heard. (*Snicker* cute nod to “The Shrine — Rodney’s similarly nice-but-odd behavior back then having clued them in to his being ill ….) Radek assures him that it’s nothing like that; he’s saying that Rodney is brilliant because the man is, but that Rodney’s also hard to compliment very often because of how arrogant, egotistical, and stubborn he is. (Awwww! Too bad the situation isn’t what it seems ….) “And brilliant!” Rodney finished with a smile. “Yes, Rodney, and brilliant,” Radek concedes quietly, somewhat exasperated. (And affectionate? Well, I guess it doesn’t matter, considering …) Pleased by Radek’s compliment — and ignoring the criticisms — Rodney eagerly gets back to work, telling Radek to pull up a chair.

On the mainland, John asks Kolya what his “Plan B” is; Kolya replies that he’s going to have his guys fix the ‘jumper and use it to attack the city. (Yeah, because the Genii are so handy with the ancient tech. *Snicker*) John says he can think of a flaw in that plan; Kolya reveals that he knows about needing the Ancient gene, but John’s going to give them a hand. (I think even if I hadn’t seen the previews, I would have guessed what was coming next.) Kolya’s men remove him from the tree, holding his arms out to each side with the ropes. Kolya gives John one last chance, then brings a machete down on John’s arm. (And that’s the scene I saw in the preview that made me convinced before the ep even aired that John was having a dream or something. Of course, there’s always the possibility that they might find a way to grow his arm back, so even now it’s not entirely out of the question that this is real, save for the other flaws that would only be acceptable in a dream, where logic goes out the window. For example, while the ‘jumper would allow they to get up close without suspicion, they would no longer have the tactical advantage of the explosion sent through the ‘gate to dwindle the city’s effectiveness — how many shots could the ‘jumper get in before it in turn was shot down? Also, while the ‘jumper does have manual controls, isn’t there also a mental component to controlling the little ship? Well, maybe not …. At any rate, losing one’s hand is, to me, and absolutely horrifying proposition! *Shudder*)

John wakes up, horrified to find a white cloth bandage where his hand used to be. (No blood — cauterised?) Kolya calls him interesting for coming so far to protect people he doesn’t even know, musing that John either has a death wish or is running from something. He asks what John’s running from, but the battered and dazed Colonel doesn’t reply. (Mallozzi says the ep was originally going to explain that Sheppard feels responsible for his mother’s death, but that they decided to save that tidbit for later. With the cancellation, I figure later will never come, alas — I can’t see them putting it in the movies. Oh, the torture! That’s some lovely angst to work with in fanfic, though! …)

Rodney walks into his lab, telling Radek that the radiation he’d noted goes beyond the city. (Yeah, as far as the mainland!, ad John well knows! *Snicker*) Radek says he thought it wasn’t dangerous; Rodney says it isn’t; it’s very low and at worst might cause headaches or trouble sleeping. Radek says, offhandedly, that they’ll shut it off before bedtime (what’s that, 2 am?), stressing that Rodney should focus on the data. (And it’s here that I realise Radek might be a fake, that Sheppard probably isn’t the only one hallucinating, and that the radiation must be acting like the Wraith device from “Phantoms”. I figure Rodney’s being used by someone to find out what information is in the device. I’m wrong, of course, but at least I’m close. At this point, my big question is whether it’s all being seen in a dream or if Rodney is seeing a hallucination while awake.) Rodney admits that, despite being a genius, he hasn’t gotten anywhere. Radek points out that he said Rodney was “brilliant”, not a “genius”. “Same dif,” Rodney says, dismissively. (I’m with Rodney, but maybe the moment is meant to downplay Radek’s niceness and make him not seem so out of the ordinary.) Rodney remarks on how the script doesn’t seem complicated, mentioning a pattern of twelve within it; Radek says it’s like their being prompted to enter a password into an alien laptop. He’s only kidding (or so he says), but Rodney takes the suggestion to heart, deciding that aliens can have passwords too, and the pattern is a puzzle, a prompt. (Sorry I can’t explain the puzzle — I’m severely maths-impaired. *Cough*) Rodney runs some pattern recognition software, saying “If I’m right — if we’re right — we can unlock the alien laptop.” (Awww. He’s been doing that more and more lately, trying to give credit where it’s due, so he might have said it even if Zelenka hadn’t said something nice about him first ….)

Woolsey finds Conrad out on a balcony. “You poached my private spot!” he tells her (*ROFL*) She’s clearly thrown by that. He tries again: “Uh, what I meant to say is, you discovered my little personal area.”(Nope, still sounds dirty, “Dick”.) “Uh, this is where I come [beat] to be alone with my thoughts,” he clarifies. (I thought I just had a dirty mind with that pause, but apparently Mallozzi caught it as well — and once again, credits Picardo for the delivery. Still, it’s not like Mallozzi didn’t practically hand the joke to him with the other dialogue. Those naughty boys! *Snicker*) She asks if he’d mind sharing; of course not. They make a little chitchat as they enjoy the view, and he thanks her for her advice from earlier. She asks if they backed down; he doesn’t think they will, but at least he’ll go out swinging. She tells him he’s a good man, and that she wishes they could see that. He asks her to dinner; she says yes. He asks when he should pick her up; she says it would be better if they met up. Amelia arrives, telling him that he’s off-radio, and McKay needs to see him. (I assume she used his subcutaneous transmitter to see where he was. Maybe they need to install speakers out on the balconies, so they can page people who might be outside. Then again, they couldn’t set up plot points like this, then ….) As Woolsey follows Amelia, we see that Shen has been watching them. (At this point, I suddenly wonder if either Conrad is actually a real IOA rep herself, undercover, and Shen had just realised that the IOA planted her, with their whole story arc being unrelated to the device or Sheppard’s, or if Shen and Conrad are in cahoots, and actually both aliens on the same mission as the psuedo-Radek and psuedo-Kolya. Yeah, okay, I’m well off the mark with Shen, but on the right track with the alien theory with Conrad, Radek, and Kolya at least.)

In Rodney’s lab, a pleased and excited Rodney tells Woolsey how the device is storing the entire history and culture of a dead civilisation, including medical discoveries and specs for weapons. He’s hesitant; Woolsey accurately senses a “but”. Rodney assures him that there’s no “but” — more of a “by the way ….” He explains that, besides the info, there’s the chemical building blocks for a silicon-based life-form in the device; it’s was supposed to see worlds with this life, and when that life “reached a certain level of intellectual maturity”, they would inherit the knowledge of their ancestors. He doesn’t know why it didn’t reach it’s final destination, but they could use the Daedalus to get it there. Woolsey says for him to copy the data and send it on its way, then. Rodney grimaces, saying that’s where the “by the way” comes in: accessing the data would destroy the biological samples. They can save the alien civilisation by sending it on its way, or they can retrieve the data and destroy them.

On the mainland, Kolya expresses disappointment that John didn’t put up more of a fight, saying that even the scientists did before they’d killed them. (Despite the fact that, last we knew, they were still on the run. John should be wondering now why Kolya didn’t use them to make him fork over the IDC. Or rather, I would hope he would, if he wasn’t clouded with pain and shock ….) “Just another two you couldn’t save,” Kolya adds, rubbing it in. Another Genii tells Kolya that they were able to get the ‘jumper fixed, and initialised it with John’s hand. Kolya turns to gloat — and finds John gone. The other Genii man suggests they come back and finish him after they destroy Atlantis; Kolya insists that they find and kill him now. John hears the exchange (which, in hindsight, was entirely for his benefit — and ours, of course, to fool us), turns his gunstrap into a sling for his wounded arm, tucks the stump into his vest (*shudder*), and hurries off.

After saying some cheerful hellos to the crew in the control room (including “Hello … you!” to poor Chuck, *snicker*), Woolsey approaches Amelia, asking her to find Conrad and tell her that, in light of McKay’s discovery, he needs to postpone their dinner. She searches the database, but can find no such person. (Idiot that I am, for a small moment, I forget the alien theory and this makes me believe all the more that Conrad’s a spy. I’ve been watching My Own Worst Enemy; I blame that …)

On the mainland, a Genii is caught in a snare that Sheppard apparently set. (Impressive, in light of his injury and pain!) He runs out of his hiding place just as two other Genii approach; they fire at him, hitting their companion. He draws the man’s gun and fires on them. He stows the gun, then takes the hanging man’s radio.

Back in the control room, Woolsey tells Amelia that he’s talking about the woman he’d been talking to out on the balcony when she’d come to get him; she informs him that she didn’t see him talking to anyone. (Dum-dum-duuuum! And a rumour that their commander is a few berries shy of a full basket will probably spread like wildfire via text message after that, thanks to Chuck …. Aaanyway, I’m convinced at this point that Conrad, Kolya, and Radek are all aliens manipulating Woolsey, Rodney, and Sheppard specifically, rather than some mass hallucination/dream; Woolsey and Rodney are most likely awake, but possibly not Sheppard. Which is pretty much the case: my flaw here is that I work under the assumption that they are outside aliens who want what’s in the device ….)

Sheppard uses the radio to ambush and kill two more Genii. (John McClane, eat your heart out!)

Woolsey gets himself scanned, and finds Conrad standing over him. (For a moment, I’m thrown for a loop, as she seems, at first, to be the one giving the scan, but things are quickly explained.) He asks her what the hell is going on; Keller, at a terminal, replies that she’s checking the results. (Like I said, at least the Keller exposure is minimal this ep. Hell, I’d even welcome her more than this if the appearance stayed out of the McKeller context ….) Conrad says she won’t find anything; Keller turns, oblivious to Conrad, and says he’s fine. (I do have to give the actors props — I think pretending a character isn’t there when they are is actually harder than pretending that something that isn’t there really is ….) Woolsey asks Conrad, who stands behind Keller, what’s going on, why her name’s not in the database and why Amelia couldn’t see her. Keller, perplexed and thinking he’s talking to her, insists that she is in the database and says there’s no reason for Amelia to not be able to see her, asking when the woman came by. (Ooh, tricky double-meaning dialogue! Bravo!) Conrad reveals to Woolsey then that Keller can’t see her. Floored, Woolsey asks Conrad why; Keller, thinking he’d talking to her, answers that she doesn’t want Amelia to think she’s turned her away. (Oh, what fun this conversation is!) Addressing Keller finally, Woolsey assures her that Amelia’s fine and he’ll talk to her. Looking not entirely convinced but also not willing to say “You’re acting like a fruit loop”, Keller awkwardly goes back to his own problem, fetching pills and asking about his symptoms. As the conversation goes on, he’s trying to ignore Conrad’s insistence that they need to talk privately, but not having much luck, almost getting caught by Keller. He also answers yes to Keller’s questions about seeing shadows and flashes and hearing buzzing sounds; Keller prescribes sleeping pills, thinking him just overly-stressed from the review, asking him to come see her again if the symptoms persist. (A very amusing and well-played scene.) As he leaves, Conrad warns him that he shouldn’t take the pills. (Because she won’t be able to use him then, I imagine.)

In the lab, Rodney asks how long Radek’s been standing there in the doorway; Radek apologises contritely, saying that he didn’t want to disturb Rodney, who looked deep in thought. (More like he just popped into existence ….) McKay, in his don’t be ridiculous tone, insists that he’s always deep in thought, adding that it keeps him sharp — and sleepless. (Awwww.) Radek asks what Rodney’s doing; Rodney explains that he’s studying the readings regarding the radiation from the device. Radek is annoyed by this pursuit; Rodney argues that he’s just killing time until Woolsey allows him to retrieve the data from the device. (Originally, Mallozzi tells us, this scene was going to show how conflicted Rodney was about it, that he didn’t really want to destroy a civilisation, and Radek was all sympathetic. Mallozzi doesn’t explain why the scene was changed, but it bothers me that it was — after Rodney seemed to genuinely believe they should send the aliens on their way, unharmed, now he seems a bit callous and greedy.) Radek asks if McKay thinks Woolsey will in fact give the green light; McKay, a bit derisive, says of course, they can’t pass this up. (Well, I guess we could read his tine as sarcasm or disgust. I would rather have had the bonding moment, though, even if it isn’t the real Radek.) Suddenly, the computer pops up with something, and Rodney realises with dread that he’s seen the readings before ….

A Genii fires on a still form on the ground. Upon closer inspection, it’s one of his compatriots, wearing John’s tack vest. The shooter turns just in time to see John as the colonel throws a knife into him.

Woolsey finds Conrad in his (snazzy!) quarters. She tries to apologise for making him think he’s crazy, but he snaps at her, asking who and what she is. She explains candidly that she’s “the physical manifestation of [his] romantic and sexual ideals.” He’s a bit stunned, clearly thinking he’s lost it; she assures him that he’s not crazy. She’s there to plead on behalf of an alien civilisation; he realises she’s talking about the device. (Oooooh. I feel really stupid for not figuring that out, especially after the radiation clue — of course she comes from the device. Psuedo-Radek wasn’t trying to enlist Rodney’s help in cracking the device and learning its secrets; he was trying to get Rodney to discover what it is and help it complete its mission!) Shen arrives; Conrad reminds Woolsey that Shen can’t see her, and he opens the door. Shen says, as she enters, that she thought she heard him talking to someone. He says he was just running through the pep talk he was going to give microbiology. (Hell, we saw him practice his welcome speech to her out loud, so that’s quite believable!) She insists that she saw him talking to himself on the balcony; he argues that talking out loud helps him to put things in perspective. She suggests that seeing someone in his position do that could be disconcerting, especially when he’s faced with a major decision. (But who doesn’t talk out loud to themselves when sorting out a problem??) He realises that she’s going to use this as the final excuse to get rid of him. Shen mentions McKay’s report about the device. Woolsey says it’s an impressive find; Conrad points out that it doesn’t belong to them. (And thus Woolsey, amusingly, has to juggle his conversation with Shen and his reactions to Conrad.) Shen is not at all happy that they’re considering not retrieving the data from the device. While Conrad sticks up for the aliens, Shen makes it clear that she feels this is too valuable to lose and that the alien races’ time is done. (Truthfully, I can understand Shen’s perspective and see an argument for it, especially since, as she says, the seed might not even take, and it could mean a better chance at survival for the humans. But I still would choose to give the aliens a chance at their own survival and respect their dying wish.) Woolsey is leaning hard towards helping the aliens. (I wonder if it would have occurred to him to do so if not for Conrad?) Shen warns him that following procedure with this could save him his job. (The plot here is nicely played out, methinks, a good dilemma for Woolsey that nicely illustrates the compassion he’s gained since his arrival, how he’s grown to realise that the rules can often hurt as much as they are meant to help ….)

John spots and shoots Kolya, but when he goes in for the kill, Kolya’s not there! And then suddenly Kolya jumps him, knocking him off a cliff. John manages to grab hold to a bit of vegetation and dangles from his one remaining hand above a river. (Nice work on the special effects, there — it’s really only a twelve-foot cliff!)

In Woolsey’s quarters, an outraged Woolsey asks Shen how dare she threaten him; she insists that she’s only saying how things will play out if they lose the device. Conrad pleads on her people’s behalf. Rodney storms in, saying they need to get rid of it, talking about the energy signature, saying how similar it is to one they’ve encountered before that “can induce mass hallucinations”. (Which makes me wonder why they aren’t all going crackers, why it’s taking the AI to do it for the three men.) Conrad says that it can also “function as a means of communication between two vastly different species.” (Kinda like the whalefish and their “telepathy” in “Echoes”?) Shen wants them to salvage the data and destroy the device. Rodney looks a little horrified (good!) as he looks to Woosley. Woolsey thanks them for their input and ushers them out the door, saying he’ll apprise them of his decision soon. He turns to Conrad and tells her to tell him what’s going on.

Kolya, meanwhile, encourages John to use his “other hand” to pull himself up. John pulls his arm free of his tack vest and is shocked to see that his hand is there. Kolya says he has no intention of letting John die. John climbs back up.

Kolya begins to tell John the alien’s story about how, thousands of years ago, the Sekkari were going extinct. Conrad continues the tale with Woolsey, talking about seed-carriers that were programmed to go to many worlds, Kolya says the seed-carriers carried a repository of the race’s knowledge and history — including the mistakes that led to their end. Conrad reveals that the carriers were linked together via subspace communications, so that they might know when one of them was successful, but and none of them made it to their destinations. Kolya explains that, when this particular unit malfunction, he guided it to this world, hoping it might be suitable for their life; Conrad says it wasn’t, so the device has been sitting for 2,000 years on the ocean floor. She adds that the unit picked up a signal from one of their “submersibles”; Woolsey realises she means the ‘jumper that Rodney took out of the underwater bay. She, the carrier’s AI, scanned the city and linked with Woolsey, hoping, after getting to now him, to convince him to help. He accuses her of manipulation; she insists she was just trying to get to know him and determine if she could trust him. (What about Rodney? He may have made the choices, but you deftly manipulated him into making them!) Woolsey asks if she couldn’t just have asked form the start; she explains that, as the last hope, she couldn’t risk it, and apologises. (Okay, that works for me.)

Kolya explains that John, being military, was the biggest threat, the one most likely to use force to secure the repository, so he had to keep him distracted. John protests that a sabotaged ‘jumper would have been enough, the AI explains that it can’t maintain static illusions for long (hence Radek having to constantly leave and come back rather than stay sitting for long periods, I’d wager), so it had to keep his mind occupied, lest he discover the subterfuge. “And that’s what you chose?” John asks, scowling; Kolya explains that it was John’s mind that directed the events; he chose it, not the AI. “You’re saying I tortured myself?” John asks. “You torture yourself every day, John,” the AI replies, explaining that, in this case, he was manifesting his darkest fears. (San’s clowns, anyway …. Oooh, another great character-study moment! I have goosebumps! Yummy angst, too! Interesting that, even while torturing himself, he still kicks ass — the consummate soldier! He blamed himself for the scientists’ deaths, so he took out the guys that killed them ….) Conrad tells Woolsey that he has a decision to make.

John returns to the not-damaged ‘jumper, finding the scientists waiting; Parrish complains about how long they’re been waiting for him. (I thought they were supposed to stay overnight? It hasn’t been a day yet ….) Sheppard tells him to shut up and get in the ‘jumper. (*Snicker* You do not wanna mess with him today, Parrish ….)

Shen, working on a laptop, gets radioed by Amelia, who tells her she has an incoming message. She gets a video feed of a man named Luther, who informs her that, though he would prefer her for the job himself, the rest of the council has voted for James Coolidge to replace Woolsey. She’s outraged. Luther tells her she will still be rewarded— with the position she’d told Woolsey he was going to get. Luther signs off, and she closes the laptop a little forcefully, deeply upset. (And I’m left wondering what they plan to do with Woolsey — but of course, not only is the point moot, it never would have been an issue even if he had left, it seems ….)

When Shen goes to leave, she informs Woolsey that she’s given him “a glowing review”; since his fate rested on that report, he is now the permanent leader of the expedition. (I’m shocked to find myself glad ….) He says he doesn’t understand; she cryptically explains that she’s not anyone’s puppet, adding that “they should have thought of that before delivering yesterday’s update.” She bids him good luck and walks over to the ‘Gate. Woolsey looks to Amelia in confusion; she’s baffled, saying that “there hasn’t been a scheduled dial-out in days.” Understanding crosses Woolsey’s face. (Oooh, sneaky alien!) Woolsey turns and spots Conrad, and asks Amelia for a moment alone, which she grants. He asks Conrad she was the one responsible; grinning, she calls it a going-away present. He thanks her.

John and Rodney wheel the device in then, Rodney saying that it’s all fixed up. “Woolsey asks Conrad what will happen to her (the AI) when the device reaches its final destination. Rodney, standing between them, looks up at him in confusion for a moment before realising he’s talking to the AI, and hurriedly moving out of the way, looking about. (Awww, he’s sooo adorkable! Odd that he can’t see the AI, I originally found myself thinking at this point, but if course it’s set-up for a couple of final funny bits …. Anyway, that must have been an interesting thing for Woolsey to explain, the AI’s existence! And for John to report, too! *Snicker* But how did they avoid telling Shen? Or did they tell her, and she simply didn’t consider that the AI might make her hallucinate?) Conrad explains that she’ll sleep until needed again. The Ai then turns to John, saying that she realises that his experience may have been unpleasant; “Yeah, well, just a little bit,” he replies dryly. Rodney is upset to realise John can see the AI but he, himself, can’t. (Awww! Jealous of his boyfriend! *Snicker*) John glares at Rodney. The AI apologises to John; he gives a little oh, sure, no problem sort of nod, the kind that says he’s really still ticked. Amelia announces that the Apollo is ready to beam it up; Woolsey explains to Conrad that it will take her to her new world. Rodney snaps, whining that, after helping it all day, he should “get a little face-time” with her. She speaks to him, drawing his attention, and reveals her true form, shimmery and skeletal. (You know what’s funny? Sheppard’s eyes suddenly bug as he looks at her, but before she transform. Oops. Still, yay for a non-human alien! Now if only we could see a non-humanoid alien ….) “Neat! …” Rodney says, breathlessly, awed. Woolsey bids her good luck, and she’s beamed out. We see him smile, thoughtfully, as Rodney and John walk behind him, John teasing Rodney for saying “neat”. Rodney complains that she caught him off-guard, asking what Sheppard would have said; John replies, “Weird.” (*Snicker* Oh, yeah, that’s polite! Another cute little McShep moment. *Squee*)

But our story’s not over yet! We see Sheppard’s team eating at the same table as before, this time with Sheppard there as well. (Yay, a team moment!! I adore scenes like this!!) Woolsey passes by; Teyla once again invites him to join them. He starts to beg off, saying that he has reports to do, but then thinks better of it; they scooch over to give him room for his tray at the end of the table. Rodney asks, baffled, if Woolsey really had no idea all that time that what he was seeing wasn’t real; irritated, Woolsey assures him that Rodney wouldn’t have been able to tell either, the AI was so convincing. Bemused, Rodney says he figures the AI knew it couldn’t fool him, so just focused on Woolsey and Sheppard. John remarks on the coincidence of the timing, the AI having first appeared to Woolsey that morning and Rodney having found the device that afternoon; Woolsey agrees. Rodney, laughing it off, insists that he was clear-headed and that it was his own genius that found it, with, as much as he hates to admit it, “a little help from Zelenka.” Sheppard says Zelenka’s off-world. Rodney says no, “he came back yesterday.” At the tables stares, he elaborates that Lt Donovan (the team leader) had a reaction to the food, so they came back early. Teyla and Woolsey share a look. Rodney notices the expressions of everyone. “Didn’t they?” he asks, looking uncertain. Sheppard looks at him with an expression that says McKay is crazy, which melts into a knowing (but affectionate?) smile. (*Gush* Yeah, I watched that a few times too, just like that handshake last ep. *Cough*) Rodney starts to curse; Sheppard says he guesses it wasn’t much if a coincidence after all. Woolsey pats Rodney’s shoulder in commiseration. (The AI was quite clever in getting Rodney to do all the work, since it couldn’t, by appealing to his ego and giving subtle suggestions, guiding him into finding it on his own! But how did the AI get the transporter to work without a physical body? Well, perhaps it hacked into the system, I guess …. I think it had expected McKay to react with more sympathy to the allergy thing, though, and therefore be more receptive to what it had to say in the beginning by way of opening a friendly dialogue. *Snicker*)

While it might not be a particularly spectacular episode, it was a fun little story nonetheless, with some really nice character development. As I said, the fact that it’s not a team ep is my only real regret about it. I think it’s cool that Mallozzi resurrected a character of his from SG-1, Shen, though. I’m also glad that we got to see Kolya one last time; odd as this may seem, since it wasn’t really him anyway, I’m especially glad we got to see a nice Kolya, if only to see the softer side of the actor. I was very happy with the Rodney/Radek moments, too — sure, it wasn’t really Radek, but after the sweet moment of kindness he showed Rodney at the end of another Mallozzi ep, “This Mortal Coil”, I can believe that Radek may at least think nice things like that about McKay, even if he wouldn’t necessary say it out aloud …. And of course I’m appreciative of even the tiny little McShep moments.

See you next week, for my review of “Brain Storm” — if I can stomach doing one! I’ll have to keep reminding myself that it’s a Gero ep, and a Rodney-centric one; I should be deliriously happy about that. Oh, how I wish I could look forward to it more — damn Keller! Well, perhaps Gero will manage to make McKeller believable and palatable to me. I certainly enjoyed the glut of Keller-lite/free eps so far the back half of the season, so I guess this Keller-heavy one and “Identity” are the price to pay for that ….

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Wolfen Moondaughter is on the editorial board for the comics industry webzine Sequential Tart, for which she has written since late 2001. She’s an artist, too, having done spot illustrations for Dragonlance, among other things. In her spare time, she’s a rabid fanficcer/fanartist. See more of her work at her site, Wolfen’s Webworld.

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