Geek Survey: President B-Rock
By Lisa Fary
I feel like the Death Star just exploded.
Spontaneous celebration broke out here when Barack Obama won the election. People streamed into the streets, cheering. Car horns honked to the cadence of “Yes we can!” Strangers hugged and cried together. I was exhausted from working at the polls since 6 AM, but still ran down to City Hall with John to join in.
I’ve never seen a reaction like this before – not for politics, not for a new president. So, when I tried to describe the feeling, the best I could do was, “This is like the end of Return of the Jedi.”
And it is. A skinny guy defeated an empire with the help of his rebel friends. What happens from here, like building the New Republic (if you read the novels) will be a struggle, but it’s ours.
What else does B-Rock’s – er, President-Elect B-Rock’s victory feel like?
It’s like the Fellowship defeating Sauron, destroying Mount Doom, and saving Middle-Earth from a hellish future.
It’s like the US-led international counter-attack against the alien invasion in Independence Day.
It’s like Spider-Man swinging through the streets of New York at the end of the first movie.
It’s like Batman saving Gotham from the League of Shadows.
It’s like the Goonies saving their neighborhood from the evil country club expansion.
It’s like Bruce Willis destroying the asteroid at the end of Armageddon.
It’s like the Ghostbusters blowing up the Stay-Puffed Marshmallow man.
I know all of the problems of the past eight years aren’t going to be fixed overnight or even in one term, but I’m feeling really positive right now. I’m feeling like it can be done, it will be done.
Yes we can. Yes we did. Yes we will continue.
Never miss an update. Subscribe to Pink Raygun by Email or subscribe via RSS
|
|
Lisa Fary’s early exposure to classic Battlestar Galactica in 1979 is largely responsible for her lifelong interest in science fiction and her childhood ambition of being an intergalactic space cowgirl. She thinks diagramming sentences is a fun alternative to Sudoku.
“This is like the end of Return of the Jedi.”
Can we roast Dick Cheney on a bonfire?
…and just like *all* of those examples you cited, the victory was completely assured from day one.
This is a huge deal, it really is, but even if Obama hadn’t run, the Republicans were loosing this one. So if it wasn’t Obama now, it’d be Clinton now, and if it wasn’t her, it’d be someone else.
Back in the 1970s, Jimmy Carter resoundingly defeated Gerald Ford, but that wasn’t so much a vote FOR Carter as it was AGAINST the Nixon/Ford era. People were furious. The Democrats could have run a trained chimp against Ford and won (Arguably they did.)
What happened last night is very similar – I mean, I predicted it fairly accurately months ago – - but I sincerely hope that it’s differently. I hope, hope, hope this is the beginning of some real change in both parties, and I hope hope hope that they don’t blow it the way Carter did.
Surround me with Ewoks, I don’t care! I’M SO EFFING HAPPY RIGHT NOW.
Those victories were completely assured from day one because it was in the script and happy endings are good for marketing and ticket sales. With every real election comes the real threat of it getting stolen.
I think it will be different than the Carter years. I think we’re looking at something more similar to FDR than anything else. Right now there’s an economic crisis, a need for jobs, and an infrastructure that desperately needs to be improved or flat out rebuilt in places. FDR made that work to the country’s advantage.
Something else the Obama has going for him that Carter didn’t is momentum. Rachel Maddow pointed out last night that the Obama campaign harnessed the voter registration movement, rolled that right into an early voting movement, rolled that into getting out the vote on election day. Now they should roll it into something else.
FDR might be a valid comparison. Reagan is probably a valid comparison too. (Don’t scoff just because you’re a leftist: Reagan managed to channel extreme anger and frustration at an inept president into a very strong groundswell of public support and momentum that he rolled right into a damn impressive first Hundred Days) FDR did this too. It’s also worth noting that Reagan idolized FDR.
Some victories can be stolen from you. This wasn’t one of those. It may have seemed like that after the ‘00 and ‘04 debacles, but the democrats ran very, very sloppy campaigns in those years.
Other pretty-much unarguable statistics that govern these kinds of elections:
1) Eisenhower was our last bald president. Since Television came in to presidential campaigning, we have never elected a bald president. Nor will we.
1a) If both presidents have hair, the better looking of the two always wins. Examples:
Nixon V. Kennedy: Kennedy.
LBJ vs. Barry Goldwater (Bald): LBJ
Nixon vs. Humphrey (Balder of the two): Nixon
Nixon vs. McGovern (Combover): Nixon.
Ford vs. Carter: Carter.
Reagan vs. Carter: Reagan.
Reagan vs. Mondale: Reagan.
Bush vs. Dukakis : Bush (I’ll admit in this case it’s seemingly a line judge call, but George Bush is really tall, and lots of people find that attractive)
Bush vs. Clinton: Clinton
CLinton vs. Dole: Clinton
Bush vs. Gore: Bush.
Bush vs. Kerry: Bush.
Obama vs. McCain: Obama.
So the man has nothing to fear so long as there’s a dearth of attractive republicans to run against him.
Foregone conclusion.
But seriously, congratulations. I know you really wanted this, and I’m happy for you. I really am.
There are no words for how happy I am about this.
It’s like when they rescue the whales in Star Trek 4.
I love how you had one of the same reactions as I did. I saw the crowds going crazy and celebrating and I immediately went “Wow, I feel like we just need some Ewoks and some digital images of parties on Corsucant and it will be the end of Star Wars!”
All hail the King long live the King! Guess It was time for a change. He will not rule alone. He will be watched by ALL. Good luck
I’m an older geek, so this is how I feel
Sorry the embed code didn’t work so here’s the link:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Clx-aAxKiQM
Hoobajoobah, you say since television came in to presidential campaigning, we have never elected a bald president. Nor will we. Please don’t tell that to Joe
the Plumber, it’ll hoit his wittle feelwings.
@Doctor Zen: Weaponized milk. . . tasty.
@ Wildofski:
He can’t be president. He can be a starship captian, though. That’s almost as good.