Fox News has made an issue of the Obama’s “terrorist fist jab”, but what about the “Elitist Ass Pat”?
It all started with a dap between the Obamas when B-Rock clinched the Democratic nomination last week:
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E.D. Hill of Fox News called it a “terrorist fist jab” and, in her subsequent interview with a body language expert, wondered what ever happened to the good ol’ pat on the back. Had Ms. Hill watched the video for another second or two, she would have seen a good ol’ pat on the back. . . pat on the backside, that is.
From this angle, the ass pat is concealed to the viewer:
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But, go to another network, and there it is:
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Further examination of the video revealed that B-Rock’s hand did not actually make ass contact; however, the hand was clearly aiming for ass, thought better of it, and made way for the lower back.
The ass pat between these two Ivy League educated people is clearly a signal to B-Rock’s elitist constituents. When B-Rock pats his wife’s ass, he’s patting all of their elitist asses as if to say, “Now here’s something worth clinging to.”
Is this a hint at the future of gender relations under an Obama administration? Ima G. Nary, self-published author of the ebook The Ass Pat Through History, thinks it just might be.
“It’s a clear lack of respect for her [Michelle Obama’s] space and physical person. You don’t see Hillary Clinton getting patted on the ass.”
What does this elitist ass pat mean for America? Will we see more affectionate couples taking part in public ass patting? How will this effect America’s youth? Only time will tell.
Score
Genuine Affection: 1 Geeks: 0
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Lisa Fary's earliest influences are Princess Leia, Rainbow Bright, Astronaut Barbie, and her 6th grade teacher, Ms. Palmer. She's angry that it's 2011 and she still doesn't have a hovercraft, but will accept a jetpack as consolation. That jetpack had better be pink with a rhinestone monogram. 
Is this more or less pardonable than the president’s “German Chancelor Backrub” from last year?
I”m actually a fan of the affectionate ass pat and thought this was cute. It shows that the Obamas are genuine.
…and as far as I can tell, our president and the German Chancellor really are buddies, even if the backrub clearly startled her. He had her over for a barbecue and everything, and she had a big teutonic roast wild boar thing for him…
I am a BIG fan of both the dap AND the ass pat. The Obamas are clearly a couple that has sex. A lot. And I appreciate that.
I like to know that my president is happily getting some on a regular basis. It'll keep his finger off the button.
But seriously, it bothers me that a couple expressing affection for each other like this in public could ever be considered "unseemly" or "vulgar" or something. They love each other and like to touch each other sometimes. That's a good thing!