By Lisa Fary
Starbuck needs a glue gun, a fun shaped hole puncher, and some pink glitter. Only then will her therapeutic crafts table be complete.
With the amount of time we have left to resolve the BSG story, do we really have minutes to spare for Starbuck and her fingerpaint recreation of Fozzie Bear’s Studebaker?
Come to think of it, Starbuck and Leoben’s seemingly blind search for Earth is a lot like Kermit and Fozzie trying to find their way to Hollywood in The Muppet Movie. Even Kermit and Fozzie’s catchy tune, “Movin’ Right Along”, is appropriate to Starbuck’s current situation with Leoben and the stranded Cylons:
Movin’ right along
Foot-loose and fancy free.
Gettin’ there is half the fun; come share it with me.
Movin’ right along!
Doog-a-doon, doog-a-doon
We’ll learn to share the load!
We don’t need a map to keep this show on the road.
So, if Starbuck is Kermit and Leoben is Fozzie, how would we round out the rest of the cast of Muppetstar Galactica?
| Adama and Tigh: | Statler and Waldorf (two old timers who criticize everything) |
| President Roslin: | Sam the Eagle |
| Apollo: | Miss Piggy (totally in love with Kermit and never really getting him) |
| Gaeta: | Scooter (backstage gofer and road manager with an eye for details) |
| Baltar: | Gonzo |
| Baltar’s Hot Babes: | Gonzo’s chickens |
| Six: | Camilla the Chicken (the love of Gonzo’s life) |
| Chief: | Rowlf the Dog (moonfaced and a bit philosophical) |
From here, this is what will happen: the fleet will break down and Baltar will sing a touching song by a campfire:
This looks familiar, vaguely familiar,
Almost unreal, yet, it’s too soon to feel yet.
Close to my soul, and yet so far away.
I’m going to go back there someday.
Then, the fleet will finally get to Earth, only to discover that Orson Welles is the Imperious Leader and that their whole ordeal was for a new reality show on Fox (which will be cancelled after three episodes).
I haven’t figured out when the fleet will run into Doctor Teeth and the Electric Mayhem. Maybe they’ll be on the ship of lights or that casino planet.
Oh, wait. Wrong Battlestar.
But, what really happened in this episode? Leoben showed up, Chief got a hug, Helo beat down some guy who was smaller than him, and the Demetrius crew mutinied against Starbuck (which we kind of knew was coming anyway. Even she didn’t seem too surprised by it).
Oh, well. As long as Helo and Anders continue to wear tank tops, I’m moderately appeased.
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Lisa Fary is a graduate of the creative writing program at Florida State University and holds an advanced degree in Special Education. Her early exposure to classic Battlestar Galactica in 1979 is largely responsible for her lifelong interest in science fiction and her childhood ambition of being an intergalactic space cowgirl.
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Lisa Fary's earliest influences are Princess Leia, Rainbow Bright, Astronaut Barbie, and her 6th grade teacher, Ms. Palmer. She's angry that it's 2011 and she still doesn't have a hovercraft, but will accept a jetpack as consolation. That jetpack had better be pink with a rhinestone monogram. 
I remember you and Chad running around the house with wooden guns in Pacific Beach, San Diego made of wood that I cut for you two! Good memories
But, what really happened in this episode? Leoben showed up, Chief got a hug, Helo beat down some guy who was smaller than him, and the Demetrius crew mutinied against Starbuck (which we kind of knew was coming anyway.
You said it. Also, I’m so sick and tired of being teased about the final effing cylon. Just let it happen already.
Ugh. It’s like waiting to find out who the final member of the Lost Oceanic Six is. They’re building up so much tension around it that, no matter who it is, it’ll be disappointing.
“Muppetstar Galactica”
::snerk:: It is getting kinda ridiculous.
And I’m also on the “tell us who the last Cylon is already!” bandwagon. Like most viewers, I have a few suspicions, but it’s just dragging on too long.
Oh, and I’m pretty sure that the “Oceanic Six” have all been revealed. From what I can tell, the writers are in fact counting Aaron, even though he wasn’t listed as a passenger since he wasn’t born yet when the plane crashed. But we already know Jack, Kate, Hurley,
Sayid, and Sun… so if there is another survivor besides the baby, they’re being more sneaky about it than I expected they could.