Supernatural: The Magnificent Seven

The Magnificent Winchesters by Sylvia Bond
Supernatural Season Three – Episode 1

To say that there was a fever of anticipation over Supernatural’s season three premiere is misleading. There’s no way to measure how many degrees the fever went over 98.6, nor would it capture the intense conversations on the internet about season two issues that needed to be dealt with. Being spoiler free, I tried to stay clear, but even from where I was standing, I could feel how hot people were getting.

Part of what had fans steaming was how Kripke would manage the fact that Dean made a deal with the crossroads demon at the end of season two. Dean hands over his soul, Sam lives, and Dean has one year to share with him. If Dean tries to break the deal, Sam drops dead. Fans have been more worried about Dean than a mother with a child who has polio in the days before vaccine. And how would Sam handle what Dean did on his behalf? This led to discussions about Sam’s guilt and anger at his brother handing over his life in such a cavalier manner. We also wanted to know how Dean would spend his last year, and how (not whether) he would get out of the deal. Many speculated that Dean would get laid, eat what he wanted, and live life to the fullest, cause he ain’t skert o’ nothin’, not even goin’ to hell. Mostly, the “what will Kripke do” discussion was benign, because although we were concerned, we were sure that Kripke wouldn’t be so foolish as to actually let either of them die. I mean, right? If he did that, he would be besieged, and I’m thinking he knows that, so, for the most part, we just wanted to see what happened next.

As for the other issue, I don’t know where to begin. Like I said, I was on the sidelines, but this is what I know. Somehow, TPTB (the powers that be) decided the show needed cleavage, so they got Kripke to create two female hunters. Apparently, Kripke was going to create one female hunter anyhow, so adding one more didn’t bother him. (He’s a genius, so this was child’s play for him. Rumors say the girls were added to give Mr. Ackles and Mr. Padalecki less to do because their 18-hour days were beginning to wear on them. Rumor also has it that the hunter girls would appear in no more than twelve episodes.) Fans were in an uproar. Some trusted in Kripke, and were willing to give the new girls a shot. Others were incensed, and by that I mean, they were combustible. You had only to bring up the new hunter girls, and you would see flames coming out of eyes, noses, ears, keyboards, computer screens. These fans didn’t want new hunter girls, it was going to spoil the dynamic between the brothers, it was going to become a titty show, and I’m telling you, people almost came to blows over whether or not the new hunter girls would be wearing high heels. People left lists and communities (or threatened to) where they’d been members for ages, friendships were splintered, and list moderators had their hands full knitting together the tatters.

That went on all summer. If you were a Supernatural fan, you could not escape. Although some tried, it was everywhere. And what influence does the average fan have on the show? Other than being able to somehow convince TPTB to get rid of Jo, (and shouting hurrah when the roadhouse burned), what could fans do? Nothing. Nothing but wait.

Until the premiere. Yeah, we get to see one of the new hunter girls, though I couldn’t tell you which one it was. (One is named Ruby, the other is Bella. Together, they’ve been referred to as Rubella. Ain’t that a hoot?) This one was blonde, fast, and a better fighter than Sam. Was she wearing high heels? I couldn’t see, but she better not have been, because if she was, then that negates the whole idea of what a hunter is and what they have to sacrifice to be hunters. There ain’t no way you can fight in high heels, so those would be the first to go. (Why am I harping about the high heels? Because, every time they were mentioned, the knives would come out, and you would see fans, sweet ladies all, going at each other like the Jets against the Sharks.)

Luckily, before more blood can be shed, in this episode, entitled The Magnificent Seven (all titles for season three come from movies), gives us the answers, at least in part, to both of those questions.

The episode opens, rightfully, with Sam in the car outside some skank motel (reading Faust, by flashlight), while Dean parties inside. With twins. Oh my. How delicious is this? Dean’s got one year to live, he deserves to have fun! (Sam certainly thinks so. Just watch him nod in approval at Dean’s antics.) Just as I deserve some eyecandy, which I get with loads of Deanskin and the outline of um, er, nipples as he gives Sam the thumbs-up sign. (Dean is bare-armed in a wife-beater t-shirt, you see. Whoever decided on Dean’s outfit for the day deserves a medal.)

But wait, it gets better. Bobby calls and dutiful Sam knocks on the door of Dean’s bra-draped love nest. And, since they are brothers, he opens the door before being bid and gets an eyeful. The scene slips to Dean driving the Impala like he’s on a roller coaster. Sam asks for Dean’s knife so he can gouge his eyes out. Dean replies that what Sam saw was a beautiful and natural act. Sam says, “But that’s a part of you I did not need to see, Dean.” Making me wonder, of course, just exactly what position was Dean in and what were those girls doing to him?

The boys investigate a cicada swarm, a sign of demon infestation. Dean (sporting an almost military buzz cut) is adorably munching on a bacon cheeseburger when they arrive, but is unconcerned with cholesterol. He’s got a year to live, he points out, so what does it matter anyway? (Sam’s got Samhair, but no bangs, alas.) There is, oddly, no dither as to whether this is their kind of gig, because it so obviously is. I miss the dither.

[nms:CW Supernatural,3,0]

As they investigate, Dean goes outside, where he is attacked by two hunters, Isaac and Tamara. We find out, after they bludgeon Dean to a standstill, that Bobby knows them. These hunters introduce an interesting new weapon to the supernatural arsenal, that of the palo santo, which is Spanish for holy wood. The palo santo is as toxic to demons as holy water. It seems a little contrived, especially since Tamara has some weird English accent, but if the palo santo is going to help the boys, then I’m willing to overlook that.

When Dean asks what “we” should do, Isaac goes ballistic, and when the testosterone starts to reek and Dean and Isaac are about to whip out you-know-what to start peeing in the corners, Tamara drags Isaac off to keep him and Dean from going fist-to-cuff. As a nice mirror, Sam is the one to calm Dean, though his eyes seem to twitch with the effort of keeping his own cool

Exterior, night. Out of the fog steps a blonde chick. Who is she? And what does she want? We don’t know, but by her glower, she’s up to no good.

Back in town, a demon incites a woman to kill for a pair of shoes. The irony of this is not lost on me, because somewhere, someone heard the furor over the high heels issue, as the shoes being fought over have very high heels indeed. Not to mention they are lizard green, which would go with about one outfit at most, and are certainly not worth the amount of blood left on the windshield and the sidewalk. Moreover, as any woman could tell you, the odds of having your size be the last pair in the store are about five trillion to one. Be that as it may, the incident shows us what the demon can do.

Sam comes along and somehow intuits that it was demonic possession. (Sometimes, Sam is just too smart, and when I mull over the realism of this, I generally allow myself to get distracted by his marvelous eyes or that strong jaw, and then my doubts fade away.) He meets up with Dean, who is hoping to get laid. On Sam’s face is a look I can only describe as tolerance for Dean’s antics worn to such a level that he’s on his last nerve.

Then Dean (that smart, clever boy), points out the security camera, which no doubt has captured the demon’s wrongdoings. Which it does, though it leads them no closer to the answer. So they follow the demon.

Exterior, day. Blond chick tracks Sam, and then vanishes before he can turn around and see her there. Why is she tracking him? (What, did I get here before you?)

Bobby and Dean wait in Bobby’s car outside a bar. Sam comes up and scares Dean (which makes me laugh, because Dean never gets scared), and then Sam shoves Dean forward to he can climb in the back seat of Bobby’s two-door (which makes me laugh again, simply because you know Sam is making it difficult on purpose just to vent his frustration). They see the demon enter the bar, but Bobby doesn’t want to go in until they know what’s happening, and Dean says, deliciously, “So he kills someone and we just sit here with our junk in our hands?” (I want to tell him, Dean, honey, whatever it is you have in your hands, I’m sure it’s not junk. Nowhere near.) But alas, Isaac and Tamara arrive and the boys realize that things are going to come to a head sooner than they expected.

In the bar, Isaac and Tamara have troubles when everyone in the bar gets up, and suddenly you realize that the couple is surrounded by demons. I never saw it coming! (I’ve got tunnel vision that way.). But wait, it gets worse. One demon makes Isaac drink drain cleaner, and I gag as I watch him. Anyone who has worked with this stuff knows what I mean, that the smell alone will get you. To imagine it eating this guy’s insides out as it bubbles and hisses over his lips was enough to make me want to barf. I was that close to running to the bathroom by the time Isaac collapses on the floor in a yellow-green and bloody pool.

The boys crash through the door (in Bobby’s junker car, not the Impala, thank goodness) and fight the bad guys using only holy water. It hisses as it lands, the demons snarl, and it’s a riveting fight scene, though it seems improbable that the four of them could fight seven demons and get out of there alive. Which, being the Winchesters, they do, and, thanks to the mighty Dean-o, also capture a demon in the trunk of the car, and then race off to a deserted, cranky house to reconnoiter.

There, with the demon tied up, Tamara shouts that she wants to go back to the bar to get Isaac. Dean offers to go with her, but Sam doesn’t want them to. “It’s suicide, Dean,” he says. To which Dean replies, “So what, I’m dead already.” There’s a potent pause between the brothers, and the conversation demonstrates Dean’s attitude towards the one-year-to-live thing. He a fatalist here, which is in direct contrast to the Dean we are used to, the one who generously practices free will, and who believes, even when tied up, that he has the upper hand and could slay anyone within arm’s reach. Also, there is no doubt in my mind that Sam is seeing this difference, and his knowledge of the cause is what constantly draws the “last nerve” expression across his brow. He knows his brother is not normally like this, however, he can do nothing but stand and watch. The interchange takes about a minute, long enough for me to see that soon, there will be a showdown between the brothers over this.

Bobby says the gang is up against the Seven Deadly Sins. For those of you not in the know, these sins are: lust, gluttony, greed, sloth, anger, envy, and pride. It’s a big hairy deal, according to Bobby. Dean, on the other hand, makes an ill-appreciated reference to the movie Seven, doing his best Brad Pitt imitation. No one laughs. Poor Dean. (And my heart turns over when Dean flinches as Bobby slams his book closed. No one should make Dean flinch like that, it’s not nice!)

The gang figures out which demon was which sin, and there’s much yelling until Bobby then enjoins them, at the top of his lungs, to remain calm.

Then, in silence, Sam and Dean approach each other as if for a courtship ritual. Sam looks at Dean when Dean’s not looking. Dean looks at Sam as Sam looks away. Then, for one brief second, they look at each other at the same time. There’s a million ways to interpret this scene, but here’s my take on it, your mileage may vary. I think that what they’re doing, essentially, is agreeing that they’re beyond hip deep in trouble, and that Tamara is a wild wire upon whom neither one of them should depend. There’s also something that seems to say that no matter how much comedy Dean tries to instill and no matter how irritated Sam is with his brother, it will always come down to the two of them to have each other’s backs. No one else matters because no one else would be as willing to die as they would be for each other. (And all this in one, silent glance.)

Then they question the demon, who has a lot to say, yadda yadda yadda. My favorite part is where he points out that Dean is a walking billboard of gluttony and lust. Like we didn’t already know this. I wanted to find out which sin Sam embodied, but the demon finishes his schpeel how humans are made of sin, and announces that his pals are on their way. I think, personally, that Sam is pride. You know, because of how smart he is, and how quickly he always demonstrates this.

Tamara exorcises the demon while Bobby, Sam, and Dean discuss. Bobby tells them the demons are hunting them. Dean says that the others should go, that he will stay behind to buy time. Sam protests, worry mixing with irritation on his face. “You’re insane, Dean,” he says, with that emphasis on Dean’s name that carries so much weight when Sam says it. Dean tries to explain the logic of his proposal, and then Sam says something that I can’t stop myself from having dirty thoughts about. He says, “Look, if we’re going down, we’re going down together, alright?” (I hang my head in shame, but I can’t help myself. Where’s my stick so I can poke at the innuendo here? But it’s a beautiful scene, in spite of my filthy mind.) Thankfully, out trots Tamara to distract me, announcing primly that Envy’s corpse didn’t make it. (Apparently, getting exorcised of a demon can be rough on the body and sometimes you die.)

What follows is a squee-worthy scene, dialog-free. It’s thirty seconds long. Sam and Dean are in a room with no chairs, nothing resembling the niceties of civilization. Dean is on the floor, backlit golden by full-throated candles; Sam is on the other side of the room, lit cool by moonlight. They prepare for the coming battle. Sam fills canteens with holy water; Dean loads his gun. They look at each other for a long moment, their shared silence shouting volumes of meaning that I cannot even begin to interpret. When I saw this scene the first time, the air left my lungs. Dean’s face is hard, for all the soft light, and I felt that his resolve to keep Sam safe was stronger than ever, and that no price would have been too much to pay to have Sam with him now. And as for Sam, I think that he’s saying goodbye to Dean, goodbye forever. I think he thinks they are all going to die. The radio crackles to life, and Dean cocks his shotgun, and stands up, ready for battle, and maybe the breath comes back into my lungs. Then again, maybe it doesn’t.

Then Isaac arrives, calling for Tamara to rescue him. Tamara suffers, even knowing that Isaac is a dead body animated by a demon. Clutching her palo santo, she rushes out. My respect for her increases as she stakes Isaac, showing me once again that Supernatural doesn’t take the easy fix in situations like this. Characters suffer; people die.

Problem is, Tamara broke the salt line, allowing the demons to enter the house. Dean gets hit on by Lust, and I mean hit on. She touches him, he kisses her. To me, it always looks like those demons he kisses (and he kisses a lot of them) taste bad. You know? Like they taste like the bottom of old toilet brush receptacles, ‘cause he grimaces when he does it. So, he’s kissing her, and just when you think he’s succumbed, he shoves her head in a bathtub of holy water, a rictus of rage tightening his beautiful face.

Then Sam gets cornered by three demons, including Pride. There’s the usual bad-guy speech where Pride says he knows Sam, he’s not impressed, and then, Pride imparts knowledge that might be useful, if Sam’s paying attention. (With Kripke, it might be a red herring, you never know.) Pride calls Sam the boy king and crows that since the Y.E. D. is dead, there is nothing to stop it from being open season on Sam. You see Sam’s face twitch, so I think the boy was listening. But what does it mean, the boy king? Will he have a crown? Will there be minions? I don’t imagine that Dean would bow down lightly to his brother, either. I mean, can you imagine “yes, your majesty,” coming from Dean’s rosy mouth? I can’t. Then, on the other hand, if it’s open season on Sam, Dean’s got a problem on his hands. Or rather, the demons have a problem on their hands, because to get to Sam, they’re going to have to go through Dean first, and Dean doesn’t have anything to loose.

But then the demons attack, and even Sam, with that reach and torque he’s got in those arms, is no match. They get him in limpage mode, and he’s choking away, when up from nowhere (like a swagman from his billabong) pops the blonde hunter chick. I can’t see whether she’s wearing high heels, and her clothes are a bit tight, but her makeup seems low-key, her hair flat enough for street-wear, and she’s not cute. Good looking, yes, but not cute. I am relieved, as I’m thinking other fans will be, though time will tell. I’m also relieved that she has a magic knife, which she uses to kill the demons to rescue Sammy. (Which makes her okay in my books.) Sam tries to thank her, and ask who she is. They have a conversation about who saved who, and off she goes, as mysteriously as she came.

In the morning, there is the usual salting and burning, though having Dean light a match in broad daylight doesn’t have quite the dishy pyro effect that I’m used to, but you can’t have everything, eh? Sam asks about the knife that can kill demons, but Dean, of course, wants to know who the chick was and why she was a better fighter than Sam, and Sam replies that it was three demons, Dean. Sam is pissed off, as he has been for the entire episode, and it’s because he’s been being so nice, or trying to, and Dean is nothing but a bundle of flip, crass, smartass remarks. (Which is why I love him.)

Off Tamara goes, and as Bobby exits, there’s a rather grim goodbye from him, and then comes the conversation that I think all fans have been waiting for, surely the first of many like it, and that is the conversation about Dean’s dumbass deal and how Sam feels about it.

Here’s the conversation. Sam wants them to find a hoodoo priestess who might be able to help Dean. Dean declines, and Sam asks why. Dean continues to refuse, and then suggests that they head out to Reno, which, in Dean’s mind, would be a whole lot more fun.

Then it starts, the good stuff. Sam grabs Dean and admits that he’s had enough. He’s tired of being nice when Dean doesn’t appreciate it, and he’s fed up with the fact that Dean seems ready to throw his life away. It’s a moment worth stopping and rewinding at. I love the look on Sam’s face, at the drawn expression, the circles under his eyes, the darkness there, and the tone in Sam’s voice. It’s so tired and full of resignation, with the quality of pain you get when you have no other option but to leave a relationship. (And I thought they didn’t make TV this good this anymore.)

Dean, cornered, displays more good stuff. His face is absolutely still and resolute as he finally explains that if they try to get out of the deal with the crossroads demon that Sam will die, so there’s no way out. (And he, Dean, will personally stop Sam from trying.) Sam looks like he’s about to pass out right then and there as it hits him: he doesn’t want to die either, so messing with the deal is a scary prospect for them both, now that he knows the truth. He looks like people look when the doctor tells them, I’m sorry, there’s no cure.

But think about it. The demon said to Dean, “If you try to weasel out of the deal, Sam dies.” But did she mean both Sam and Dean were forbidden to try, or just Dean? I think it’s the latter, and sooner or later, one of them (probably Sam) is going to figure out that Sam could try without it affecting the original deal.

Sam then wants to know how Dean could make such a deal. (His voice kills me here, as edged as a knife blade, and his eyes, like cigarettes burned holes there.) Dean says, “Cause I couldn’t live with you dead. Couldn’t do it.” All this delivered in that Deanish way, with little inflection, which fans know is the red alert as to how keyed up Dean is.

Sam points out how twisted and broken Dean was when he found out that Dad sold his soul to save Dean (oh boy, was he), and how selfish it is for him to do the same to Sam. I adore the fact that Sam uses words that so many fans have used to describe Dean, twisted and broken. Dean is one of the walking wounded, and no one, except for Sam, really sees how bad it’s been for Dean. Sam is a wreck himself, a beautiful wreck, he loves his brother so, he can’t bear to see him taken. Dean doesn’t care if Sam thinks he’s selfish, because he figures he’s done enough for the family that he can now do something for himself. He says he’s tired, and he doesn’t care that light he sees is hellfire. All he wants to do is kill some evil sons of bitches and raise a little hell, which is his mantra, and has been for two seasons. But I think that when he says he’s tired, he’s really tired of everything, including the hunting and saving, because really, there’s nothing that’s been filling Dean’s emptiness back up. He’s a well run dry, he’s a car running on E, he’s been used, and bashed, and taken, and there’s nothing left. The only thing keeping him going now is that he’s got nothing to loose.

There’s no argument Sam can make. But, by the look on Sam’s face, this conversation is going to happen again, and Sam is going to do everything he can to make it go his way. On top of which, the brothers are now at odds what their goal is, which happens sometimes when they dither over the appropriateness of a gig, but not to this degree. Again we see Dean’s fatalism, understandable in the circumstances, since he’s headed straight to hell and intends to have as much fun as he can. This infuriates Sam, and it seems this season begins by their roles having been switched. Dean, instead of Sam, feels he’s got a destiny that he cannot resist, while Sam, and not Dean, insists that there’s an answer to be found if they look hard enough.

It’s a great scene, one worth waiting all summer for. One worth hearing the shouts and curses as fangirls threatened each other as to whether Rubella would work or not. (“I’ll cut ya!”) Because, you know, this kind of scene is to me what the whole show is about.

Sylvia Bond is a ten-year technical writing veteran with too many degrees under her belt to count. She lives in Colorado, but does not ski, preferring instead to spend her money and time at the annual Great American Beer Festival, taking road trips across the United States, and reading historical fiction from the comfort of her fluffy green arm chair. She has been involved in fandom since 1993 and been writing fanfic since approximately 1993. What she finds most amazing about fandom (besides the open heartedness of fans and the sheer amount of creativity) is how visible fandom has become. “In my day,” she says, “we had to hide behind P.O. boxes to get fanfic. But nowadays, people wear t-shirts that shout their affiliation and share their shiny toys on the internet.” It’s a wonderful world.

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