I totally missed Kyle XY last summer, despite the giant posters at the San Diego Comic-con reading “Who is Kyle XY?” The image of Kyle waking up naked in the woods on the edge of Seattle struck me as a direct rip off of the opening shot of John Doe, which annoyed me because I really liked John Doe.
Which, of course, was canceled by the Fox Network. Grrr.
I caught the season two premier of Kyle XY, genuinely wanting to like it. It was like John Doe meets Dark Angel , but without the darkness of the other two shows and without the acting ability. I was totally distracted and irritated by the dialogue and non-existent emotional range of just about everyone. It was like watching dinner theater. No one overlaps, every syllable of every word is pronounced perfectly.
For most of the episode, Kyle is with Adam Baylin, the scientist that created him, learning about his past and abilities. Kyle’s past is kind of Matrix-y: he was grown in a chamber filled with pink goo that simulates a womb, which is why he has no belly button. And since Kyle was basically in gestation for sixteen years, his brain is super developed and he has the Force or something.
It was pretty torturous to watch, but I was willing to give it another week. However, there’s only so much saccharine sweet family stuff I can take and Kyle XY is loaded with it. Everyone has a moment: mom and dad have a moment, brother and sister have a moment, mother and son have a moment, Kyle has moments everywhere he goes. I’m a very bitter person. I can’t take that sweetness.
I really don’t set out to hate everything. It’s just that there is so much bad stuff out there. If the Skittles Bunny and a local plumbing commercial featuring a guy dressed as King Leonidas wielding a giant wrench is the most engaging part of the show, then the producers are doing something wrong.
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Lisa Fary's earliest influences are Princess Leia, Rainbow Bright, Astronaut Barbie, and her 6th grade teacher, Ms. Palmer. She's angry that it's 2011 and she still doesn't have a hovercraft, but will accept a jetpack as consolation. That jetpack had better be pink with a rhinestone monogram. 
You know what I hate? That dang Skittles bunny. And while I’m at it, throw in that obnoxious Starburst guy whose voice is so annoying I actually have to mute my television or change the channel so as not to be provoked to physical violence. Whoever came up with and then approved those ideas as advirtisements should be locked in a room with those commercials playing constantly and see how long their sanity lasts…
As for Kyle XY, it’s not bad if I’m in one of my ‘immune to sappines’ moods. It IS on ABC family, so sappiness is practically a requirement to get on the air. I’ve only ever watched a couple episodes though, and I missed the season two premiere. Ah well.
Nick Lea (Tom Foss) is effing hot. I was willing to sit through the ‘like, totally’ teen vibe of the show just to see his face. Dreamy.
Nick Lea played Alex Krycek on the X-Files for years. He was pretty dreamy back then, too.
Indeed. Nick Lea’s got eternal dreamy-ness. If only Kyle XY was all about him…