Lost: Enter 77

Is Locke a monkey? He does whatever a computer tells him to do. Enter these numbers and press “Execute”. If hostiles have taken over, press “77″. Let’s see, there’s a knocked out hostile on the floor. . . what is the best course of action? Duh. Play computer chess.

I get it, though. There was a similar chess program, which I spent hours playing, on our home computer growing up. It’s mildly addictive, but when we had a mad Russian with an eye patch knocked out on the floor, I tore myself away and stood guard.

Locke is obsessed with fate and destiny and spirituality. He used to blindly do what he thought the island told him to do; now he’s listening to the machines. Hmmmm. . . fate. . . destiny. . . spiritual fundamentalism. That sounds familiar.

Locke is totally one of the Final Five Cylons.

When are fictional characters going to figure out that eye patches are a sign of evil? Have you ever seen fictional character with an eye patch who was a good guy? Colonel Tigh has an eyepatch and he’s nasty. Darryl Hannah had an eye patch in Kill Bill and she was nasty. And think of all the pirates, matey.

AAAARRRGGGGHHHHHH!!!!

Sorry. That was brewing for the whole episode.

I’m really annoyed that another group, The Hostiles, was introduced in this episode. The story that was told, about people already living on the island when Dharma showed up and The Purge, pretty much renders the mythology of the Dharma Initiative useless. It’s an effort to create another mystery for fans to talk about on the message boards.

And it’s not even a new kind of mystery. All it does is rehash the mystery the writers originally created with the Dharma Initiative. The only thing that’s changed is the name of the group.

It seems like Sawyer has become the voice of the viewers, and that voice is pissed. There’s a blond girl and a Latino guy who suddenly started showing up this season; Sawyer blatantly asked “Who the hell are you?” as if he read my mind. Who are those people? He’s also the only person that acts rationally. Unlike Lost’s advertising people.

Since Lost came back last month, every episode has been billed as “The One Episode You Can’t Miss”. Except for “Not In Portland”, the episodes have been good, but easily missable. In an age of TiVo, On Demand TV and downloadable episodes, anyone who really wants to see the show isn’t going to miss it. So, stop telling me I can’t miss a single episode. It’s not like you’re giving me Heroes or Twin Peaks.

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